


The Chicken Noodle Soup

by Onlymostydead



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Ratatouille, Autistic Link, Fluff, Food, Found Family, Guns, M/M, Mild Angst, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-25
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-03-17 00:00:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 38,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18953716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onlymostydead/pseuds/Onlymostydead
Summary: Midna is a rat, but that doesn't mean she has to settle for just surviving. No, she wants to be a chef. Inspired by Chef Wilde on TV, she starts attempting more and more, despite the danger.Link is unemployed after his mom's death, and hoping for one last shot she gave him: a chance to get a job at the renowned restaurant Guard. Only one problem: he has no clue what he's doing.As unlikely a friendship as the two of them have, they'll soon find they're far better together than they ever were apart.





	1. Midna

**Author's Note:**

> I just love. Ratatouille. And I hope you guys love this as much as I do.

Midna didn't want to spend the rest of her life in a dark, damp smelling basement. For any other rat maybe, that would have been good enough. But for her...

"Midna, wait! You're going to get us in trouble!" Navi yelled after her, scampering to catch up. "Why are you going up the normal stairs, again? Let me guess, the-"

"The kitchen." They said at the same time, Navi's ears falling flat while Midna could feel her own perking up.

"What? I go up there all the time and it's never been dangerous." She argued, hopping up another step. "Are you coming?"

"Are you serious!?" Navi's whole body tensed, the hairs on her back standing on edge. "Just because the old lady's never woken up before-"

"Trust me, she won't."

"But what if she does!?"

"Then I'll sneak away, like I always do. I know how to move-"

"Without people paying attention to you, I know." Navi's ear twitched. "I don't like this."

"Then don't like this." Midna started up the steps again. "But I'm going up."

"Wait! Listen!" She shouted after her, following with loud scampering steps. "Midna-!"

But she wasn't listening anymore. The colony was her family, sure. Hell, at one point they considered making Midna their leader... But she couldn't. Not because she wouldn't make a good leader. No, because there are other things she wanted to do.

She never, ever wanted to agree with Zant, but he had been right: you can't have a leader whose mind is somewhere else. Of course, that's why she opposed him leading, too. All he wanted was the power trip.

Reaching the top of the stairs, Midna wriggled through the hole she had gnawed in the wall. She loved the colony, but there was just too much she loved about the upstairs world to stay down in the basement all the time, no matter what Zant had to say about it. Because right now...

She had learned to time her visits up into the main part of the house. Before they went out to scavenge in the morning was too early; sometimes the lady was awake, sometimes she wasn't, and all the time she was tired scavenging afterward. After a few disaster attempts then, she learned better. The lady had usually fallen asleep on the couch by mid-afternoon, which was the perfect time to sneak up.

Because at 3:30, that's when she got to see her hero.

Among all of the damp boxes and old furniture in the basement, there was also a digital clock. And she had figured out that, at precisely that time, when the old lady had turned on the TV, Chef Wilde's show would be playing.   
His show wasn't very different from the other cooking shows on, as far as the kinds of food he made, but it was all in the way he talked. If was like, well... Midna didn't know how to describe it, only that it was good.

Navi's panting caught up to her long before Navi did, though. "Someone's gonna see you coming up here one of these days, you know."

She shrugged. "And?"

"They won't be as willing to keep secrets as I am!"

Midna sighed. "And?"

Navi stopped. "You just don't care, do you?"

"Nope."

"The food isn't even that much better!" She exclaimed, growling just a little. "And we'd be in huge trouble if someone saw us."

"Then you can go back, if you're so concerned." Midna pointed out. "And the food is so much better, it's like... Like..."

"Like the thing with the rat poison?" Navi asked, a little frown tugging at the corner of her mouth. "That... I mean, it was good that you figured that out."

"Yeah. How many people did I keep from dying by sniffing that out?"

"That's not the point! You're going to get yourself killed, hanging out with humans like this." She declared. "Where are you going!?"

"The kitchen." Midna answered simply, only sparing a single glance before forging on. "But you can turn around if you're gonna be such a fraidy cat."

"I'm not-" Navi sighed, then started to follow. "Maybe I'll understand what you mean."

"I'll show it to you, but first-" Midna scampered out onto the hard floor, then used the drawer handles to hop up to the countertop. "He's on!"

"Who's on?" Navi struggled to follow, but eventually landed herself up next to Midna. "What?"

"Shh!"

Once again, Midna wasn't listening. The TV was on, and there was Chef Wilde in his chef coat, teaching his audience how to make a simple bechemel sauce, and apparently some of the different things you could do with it. Everything he did was so confident and perfect. Midna drank in all of the information like a sponge, as if she'd ever have the chance to actually cook anything like this.

Or, really, to cook anything at all.

But before long the program was interrupted by commercials. Midna turned back to Navi, remembering her idea.

"Wait! I heard this from Chef Wilde. Let me, where..." Her eyes searched the kitchen over, looking for the things she could reach. "There!"

"Are you sure about this?" Navi asked, following her over to the small bowl on the counter. "This is-"

"Shh, stop questioning things so much and close your eyes."

Midna watched to make sure she actually closed them, then reached into the bowl for a grape. They smelled delicious, sour and sweet and perfectly fresh. Unable to resist, she popped one into her own mouth before giving one to Navi.  
She closed her own eyes as well, letting herself picture the experience. Chef Wilde had described things like this as "A symphony of flavor," and if that was true Midna could hear the whole thing. The grape was a light, dancing taste, but also bright and punchy. 

"Could you see it? Hear it?"

Navi opened her eyes and looked at Midna like she was nuts. "What?"

"The colors! The sounds! Here, eat another one and just describe the taste."

She popped another one in her mouth, but then just shook her head. "Grape-y?"

Midna gave her a blank stare. "Grape-y?"

"It was the best I could think of! I'm not made for tasting and smelling things like you!" 

Rolling her eyes, she handed Navi a small bit of cheese from the bowl. "Try to do the same with this."

"Okay... Yeah, I'm not getting anything."

Midna, disappointed, broke off a chunk of cheese for herself. She couldn't imagine not being able to taste all of it, every bit of nuttiness, the funky edge to it, the salty way it coated her tongue...

"Was that it?" Navi asked. "Is that all you come up here for? Eating a little bit of cheese and grapes, and watching the TV?"

"What's 'just' about it?" 

"I don't know, I guess... I expected more?"

"No, you see, you have to... Hold on... What's this?"

Midna could smell something perfect to go with this cheese. It was something fruity, something...

"Yes!" She bounded over to the other side of the counter where, wrapped in plastic wrap, was a sliced up apple and- "Bread!"

"It's... Bread." Navi agreed. "And?"

"There's a slice cut off of it, help me with it." Midna started unwrapping the plastic wrap before turning to look at Navi again. "What?"

"You're using your front paws... Like hands."

"And? It's more hygienic this way, so you're not biting through everything." She explained, still working at the plastic. 

The bread slices were just the right size for her to be able to hold them, too...

Navi frowned. "I'm guessing you don't want me to bite through it, then?"

"Of course not! Just- never mind, I got it unwrapped enough. Now..." Midna picked up the crusty, fresh French bread in her paws and padded over to the stove. "I just need to set this down again while I..."

"What are you doing!?"

"Turning on the stove." She swung down, like she had practiced, and turned on the front burner. "Now if I put it down here-"

"Are you... Cooking?"

"What else does it look like I'm doing? Of course I'm cooking, Navi! Just... Don't tell anyone."

Navi bit at her lower lip. "Are you sure? This seems, umm..."

"It's fine, I promise. See? It's done." Midna grabbed the bread off the burner, set it back down on the counter, then switched the burner off. "So, now..."

"We eat it?"

"Of course not, it isn't finished." Midna rolled her eyes. "It has to be perfect."

"It's just food."

"It's food!" She argued, picking up the slice in her paws again. "I just need a little of the cheese and some of the apple. See, I barely cooked!"

"Barely is still cooking." Navi pointed out. "Where did you learn how to do that?"

Midna pointed to the TV. "Especially Chef Wilde."

"Chef... Wilde?"

"He's the one who wrote this cookbook!" She gestured over at the boom leaning against the wall. "He's amazing." 

"You... Read?"

"Yes, I read... Don't tell anyone."

"Is everything with you a secret?" Navi asked, scowling. 

Midna winked. "Maybe."

"It's not a joke! I'm... I'm so tired of everything being a secret. Really... Are you even listening to me?"

"No." She was busy breakjng off a piece of cheese, layering it on top of that small round of bread, then putting a couple slices of apple on top. "You should try a bite, even if you don't get it."

Navi sighed, then came over to grab a bite. But, right before she did, Midna's attention was grabbed by something else.

Chef Wilde was back on the screen, talking. She had missed most of his show, by now, and she had to crane her ear to hear him, but...

"The only thing holding you back in the kitchen is fear. When we're afraid, we don't do well, correct? So how can we cook well when we are held back by ourselves?" Chef Wilde asked, a concerned look on his gentle face. "You have to beat that fear. Don't be afraid to be wild in the kitchen."

He smiled, and that was usually where the program was over, but-

A narrator picked up in his place. "Unfortunately, it wasn't long after the late chef's cookbook, Wilde in the Kitchen, was released, that his restaurant, Guard, lost it's five star rating. A scathing review left by food critic Ganondorf Dragmire led to the revoking of a star, and not long after that the chef's health failed. He died, and one of he stars was dropped in his honor."

"What's going-"

"Shh!" Midna shushed Navi again, her appetite suddenly gone. 

Chef Wilde was... dead?

But the TV flicked off, and there was the old lady, staring right at them. 

Just her luck.

Immediately, Midna ran. She had practiced this: how to get down quickly, how fast she could scamper away. Adrenaline poured through her veins. She could feel her heart pounding throughout her whole body. She spared a glance behind her, and-

Navi was still standing there, holding the little slice of bread in her quaking paws.

"Navi!" She screamed. "Come on!" 

She didn't move a muscle. Eyes wide, every hair on her body standing straight up, staring at the old lady, her whole body radiating terror.

And the lady was grabbing for her gun.

"Navi!" Midna screamed again, starting back up the counter. "Come on!"

Finally she snapped out of it, following as they made their way back down. She wriggled into the hole in the wall, and Navi followed. For a second they just stood, panting, trying to catch their breath. 

"Think she's still coming after us?" 

A bullet tore through the wall, narrowly missing both of them, lodging into the floor.

"Yeah." Navi answered. "Pretty sure she is."

Midna snatched up Navi's paw. "We have to warn the colony, quick!" 

But it was too late for a warning. The light flashed on. The dim bulb, barely flickering on, shone down on a floor positively writhing with rats. 

"Scatter!" Zant screamed.

In a huge rush, everyone started dashing for various exits. The holes in the walls, the stairs, even holes in the floor. Midna turned back around, joining the rush headed up the stairs. She was almost out the door, when...

Of course it caught her eye.

Chef Wilde's cook book had fallen off the counter at some point, landing face down, right there on the floor. She wanted to leave it. She should have left it. But... Yelling at herself inside her head, Midna fought through the frenzied crowd and grabbed the book. It was heavy, and awkward, but she couldn't part with it.

She loved the colony, but this? This was her life.

By the time she got out to the river, though... The last of the emergency boats were disappearing. She tried to make it out to them, using the book as a raft, but they were too far. She screamed for them to slow down, but...

Zant was on the closest boat, and he wasn't going to slow down for her. No, he finally found a way to leave her behind.

Midna took a deep breath and grit her teeth. She was on her own. 

Gripping the book as tightly as she could, she tried to resist the rush of the water. It was getting dark in the tunnel, with different winding paths, and-

All of a sudden, she was upside down. Water was everywhere, rushing into her mouth, stinging her eyes. Barely, through the dirty fog of the water, she could make out the book, still floating on the surface.  
In a desperate attempt to survive, she swim up toward it, or, at least, the direction she assumed to be up. Her paws and tail felt numb. Her lungs burned for air.

Then she broke the surface, gasping for air, grasping hold of the pages once more, crawling up onto the book. No matter what, she could let g-

The water switched direction, hitting the book so suddenly it threw them both flying. Midna was in the air, aware of the light, but-

Just as suddenly as she was thrown, she hit the ground. All of the air was knocked out of her lungs upon impact. The hard concrete scraped her paws and tail as she rolled. 

There was no way she survived that. No way. Midna could see dark spots in her vision, and just as she expected them to overtake her... 

She was okay? 

Midna went through a mental checklist of her body, making sure nothing was broken, nothing was really damaged. Against all odds, she was alright.

And all alone, a voice whispered in her head.

As Midna pulled herself up, looking around, that fact hit her like a punch to the gut. No one was here. There weren't even any sounds that indicated there were rats she didn't know nearby. All she had was the dim amount of light coming from a crack far above her, and the cookbook.

All of this... For a book? All of her friends, family, the whole colony washed away to somewhere else, and she was here. Alone with Chef Wilde. So she did the only thing she could.

Read.

Front to back, cover to cover, Midna read the book recipe by recipe, over every station in the professional kitchen and every tip to make cooking at home easier. It was calming, in a way, but did nothing to drown out the ever-present silence.

All she could do was wait.


	2. Link

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Link rides to the legendary restaurant, Guard, with the hopes of getting a job, and the expectations of being laughed at. But you never know until you try...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this'll update on Monday's and Wednesday's, maybe Friday's? But I'm not sure yet. Either way, enjoy!

Link was a loser. He knew it, what family he had knew it, every job he applied to that turned him down knew it. Even his mother knew it, probably, before she passed. She never told it to him, but... He could guess so. It was pretty apparent. 

That's why, biking towards one of Paris's most prestigious restaurants, Link couldn't believe what he was doing. This wasn't him. He did roller skating, and dancing badly, and trying to do his hair to cover as much of his face as possible. He was not capable of getting a job at a restaurant, let alone a critically acclaimed one.

Was critically acclaimed even the right wording for a restaurant? He didn't know, because he was a loser. 

But with a letter tucked into his back pocket and bills to pay, he was ready to try pretty much anything.

His mom wasn't a loser, and she never was one, either. She had connections with a lot of people. Including, apparently, Rhoam Hyrule, the current head chef at Guard. Link couldn't imagine what kind of person he was, but to have that important of a job he couldn't be an idiot, which meant he definitely wouldn't hire Link, no matter what the letter said.

Steering the bike with one hand, Link reached up to tug on a long lock of hair. It was a grounding thing; letting him calm back down to think clearly.

For one, he had no real skills... Unless you count roller skating, or being really good at lip syncing shirtless in the mirror after a shower. And head chefs definitely don't count those.

For two, he didn't have any idea how to cook, how a restaurant worked, or anything else that could land him a job there. The most he knew about cooking was from TV shows. His mom used to say he could burn water.

For three, he was nonverbal. Businesses already don't like to hire autistic people, whether they'll admit to it or not, let alone when that manifests as not speaking. Hence, why he had such bad luck with jobs in the past, too.

But rent had to be payed, and this was Link's last shot.

At least it was a nice day. The sun was beating down on Link's back and neck as he rode, skidding at the corner and barely stopping before smashing himself against the alley wall. At this point, though, he barely reacted to that. He was just so used to nearly getting hit by walls it didn't faze him.  
Quickly locking up his bike, Link wiped off his hands on his pants and went around to the front. Then, remembering that the restaurant wasn't actually open this early, he swung around to the back. Those were locked too, but...

Raising up his courage, and rubbing his hair between his fingers, Link knocked.

At first, there was no reply. No one answered, no sounds from inside, nothing. Link was about ready to turn around when-

"Hello?" A tall, heavyset person with wild white-blonde hair barely tamed by nets opened the door. "Who are you?"

"I'm-" Link took a deep breath, steadying his shaky hands to sign. "I'm Link, Sera's son?"

"Sera? Chef Wilde's old flame?"

He nodded. "I have a letter, from her... To Mr. Hyrule? She hoped it would help me get a job?"

"Nice to meet you, Link. I'm Daruk." Daruk opened the door wider, letting him inside the kitchen. "Might as well get you started immediately."

"Immediately? I'm not even hi-"

"Can you wash dishes?" A dark skinned girl with bright red braids asked. 

Link nodded. 

"Great, then you've probably got the job." She smiled. "I'm Mipha, but I need to get back to work."

"Right. Thank you... Where's the..."

"Dish washer, over there." A blue haired chef barked at him, barely turning around.

He was pointing over at the end of a counter with... No dishwasher. Wait. He was the dish washer. That made sense, never mind. The kitchen wasn't even close to anywhere he had been before, and it was a little overwhelming.

But he knew how to wash dishes, and a job was a job, so he got to work scrubbing. His hands would be wet, and that would be awful, but... Definitely not the worst job he'd had. It was loud, but not too bad. That is, right now. Who knew about-

The doors to the front of the restaurant burst open, and in walked Rhoam Hyrule. He was a tall man, pale with white hair and sharp green eyes.

"Who is this?" He demanded, pointing straight at Link. 

Link's soapy hands stuttered, shaking, barely managing to get the words out. "I'm Link, Sera's son?"

"And?"

He swallowed. "She, uh..."

One of the chef's, the one with the blue hair and severe frown, pulled the envelope from Link's back pocket and handed it over. "I'm guessing this has something to do with it."

He blinked. "How did you-"

"It has his name on it." He pointed out, crossing his arms. 

Meanwhile, Mr. Hyrule was reading the letter with intent. Then, taking in a deep breath, he turned and walked into his office. 

"What does that mean?" Link signed to himself, suddenly questioning whether he'd need to be job searching in the near future.

Blue haired chef rolled his eyes. "It means he needs time to read that without you staring right at him."

"Oh."

"Get back to washing, I'll need that pot in a couple minutes."

Link nodded, glancing over at the office one more time before getting back to work. Strange, the name on the door was still Chef Wilde. He himself looked up to the late chef a lot, especially sharing a last name with him, but it seemed odd to not change the name on the office.

Either way, that wasn't his business. Right now, his business was dishes.

A few minutes later, Mr. Hyrule emerged again. He looked largely the same, but this time with a slight smile on his face.

"I'm sorry, uh..."

Link quickly dried off his hands so he didn't fling more soap. "Link?"

"Yes, Link." He shook his head. "We just don't need anyone else here, at the moment."

Daruk came up behind him, laying a hand on Link's shoulder and scaring him out of his mind. "We already hired him."

"You did what?" The old on Mr. Hyrule's face was gone, replaced with a stormy expression that scared Link out of his mind. "Without my permission? How-"

"We needed a dish washer, you know that." A short girl, still taller than Link, with a slight accent pointed out. "We already hired him."

"Dishes." He repeated, glanced at Link, then nodded. "Well then, get to work... Back to work."

Daruk pushed a uniform into his hands then pointed over at a bathroom before getting back to work. No one around here had a lot of time, that was obvious. Setting down the clothes for a moment, Link dried off the pot he was working on then went to change. 

The uniform definitely did not fit. Not even close. Whoever it belonged to before was taller... And thinner. But he was used to rolling his pant cuffs, and sleeves, and pretending that the shirt wasn't buttoned very tightly over his chest.  
Why he was in a chef's uniform, as a dish washer, he had no clue. But if that's what they wanted to do, he supposed he wouldn't complain. After all, he had a job here.

A job. How long had it been since he had been able to say that? Not only that, but a job he could talk about without being embarrassed about where he worked.

Rolling his sleeves one more time, Link went back out into the kitchen. Dishes. That made working in one of Paris's best restaurants less glamorous, that was for certain. But there were already parts of it he could see himself enjoying. For one, the smells.  
As he walked by the soup station, he looked around for a moment, made sure no one was watching, then smelled it. It was heavenly, better than anything he had ever eaten, that was for sure. If only...

But he wasn't going to steal food. That was, easily, where he drew the line. Pulling away from the pot, he turned right back around-

-and immediately sent the port of soup crashing to the floor. He wasn't sure how or why, or what he did to deserve this, only that he couldn't lose this job.   
Hauling up the soup, he set it back down on the burner it was warming on. Then he grabbed a mop, quickly soaking up all of the red soup from the white floor, leaving no evidence of it there. But there was so much soup missing from the pot...

How hard could cooking be? He had watched a lot of cooking shows. That was basically the same... Right?

Link got to work, moving as quickly as he could, glancing over once in a while to make sure no one was watching. He added some chicken stock, some garlic, some leaves that he didn't recognize, but he knew they smelled nice. After that he threw in a handful of other things that seemed correct. There. All fixed... Right?

He grabbed a spoon, dipped it down into the soup, and tasted it.

Immediately, anything he had for lunch came right back up. Link barely made it to the trash can before vomiting.

So much for having a job.

Taking a deep breath, he glanced around for someone to tell. They all seemed busy at the moment though, so...  
Link swallowed, and went right back to scrubbing pots. Maybe it just needed some time. Yeah, that would make it better. He just needed to keep an eye on it.

He really messed this one up though, didn't he? He finally gets a job, and this is what he does with it? Loses it on the same day?

Working on the pile of pots and pans, Link tried to think this through. Rent wasn't due until the end of the month, so he had some time, but what would pay for that? He only had so much money from his mother leftover after the funeral. And after that if he still didn't have a job... That's where things would get bad. 

The chef who had been working with the soup, a tall woman with bright red hair pulled up into a tight bun, came by to taste it. Fear struck Link's heart. Sweat broke out on his forehead. He could feel his eyes widening.   
She smelled it, and with a confused look on her face, tested it. The reaction was immediate: she gagged. She had the tact to swallow, but it was clearly not good. And with the restaurant opening soon... She glanced around, then went directly over to Mr. Hyrule's office.

Great. Just great. Maybe he could do something else to...

...fix it.

Link blink led once, twice, trying to figure out what he was seeing. Finally, he pinched himself. Nothing changed.  
There, on the shelf above the soup, was a rat. It was fairly small, and jet black, but those weren't the amazing things. The amazing thing was that it appeared to be... Cooking?

No, it didn't just appear to. It definitely was. The rat sprinkled in a bit of this and that, different spices, poured in some cream... Link still couldn't believe his eyes. How was it doing that? It seemed to know exactly what to do, what parts to fix, what ingredients needed to go in... And it didn't look like the original soup, either.

Wait. Was he just standing here, watching a rat throw random things into the pot of soup?

No, that couldn't be it. Not with the way it twisted the leaves in its paws before dropping them in, or how it shook in just a little bit of salt. Finally if seemed satisfied, then-

It jumped.

-Link scrambled to make sure it didn't land in the soup, disgusted by the idea of a rat in the food, but it didn't land in the pot after all. Instead, it just grabbed the ladle with its paws, using the momentum to stir the pot before landing on the countertop. 

Link paused, stirred with the ladle once more, snd pulled it out to taste.

The office door slammed open, and Mr. Hyrule burst forward from his office once more, making an immediate beeline for the soup station. Link panicked, hiding the ladle behind his back, but it was too late. His face was red with embarrassment, but Mr. Hyrule's was scarlet with anger.

"I give you a job in my kitchen, and this is how you repay me? Ruining food? We have a bad enough reputation as it is, you know, without some overgrown, unless, son of a- Rat!"

The kitchen panicked. Mr. Hyrule was swatting at the rat with a spatula. Daruk still had the blowtorch he was using in his hands. The scary guy with the blue hair had a knife. They were all scrambling to get it, to get it out of the kitchen.

Link grabbed a colander, tossing it over the rat and holding it with his elbow. "What do I do?"

Mr. Hyrule looked at him like he was an idiot. "Kill it!"

"Here!?"

"No, not here! Take it outside."

Link took a deep breath, glancing around for a moment. There, on the window ledge, there was a jar... Quickly, before the rat could escape, he switched the two containers, flipped it over, and popped on the lid. He didn't screw it on, though. Suffocating seemed like an awful way to die.

Everyone watching him, Link took the jar and headed for the door. Just as he left, he could see Mr. Hyrule about to taste the soup.

***

Link kept walking until he came to a little bridge. That seemed like a good way to do it, right? To just drop the rat down into the water, where it could swim away? It could die, so he wasn't going completely against what Mr. Hyrule told him to do, but...

As he held the jar over the water, they met eyes. He and the rat. It was breathing hard, standing on its hind pass, front paws up against the glass. Just looking straight at him. It looked scared, and alone, and trapped, and-

Link set the jar down on the side of the bridge, leaving the lid partially on. "I can't just kill you, not when you look at me like that... I'm trapped too! We're both trapped here! I can't make the soup like you did, and now he'll want me to!"

The rat, unless he was imagining things, which he probably was, hung its head a little. 

"And now look at me, sitting here, dressed for a job I'm not qualified for, signing at a rat. This is worse than talking to chickens, isn't it? I'm crazy, aren't I?"

The rat nodded.

"Wait. Did you just nod? Am I really crazy?"

It nodded 'yes' first, then shook it's head 'no.'

"So... You can understand me." 

Nod.

"And you can cook?"

Another nod.

"I... I definitely can't cook, can I?"

It waited for a second before shaking its head.

"So... We each have what each other want, don't we?"

It cocked its head to the side, staring up at him.

"You know how to cook," Link restated. "And I know how to... Be human. Could we... Work together?"

It banged on the glass with its paw, as is to say: 'let me out first, then we'll talk about that.'

"Okay... Just... I need you. Okay?"

It nodded.

"Was that just... Joking?"

It shook its head.

Link sighed, shaking his head and setting down the jar on the ground. "I really do need you, don't I?"

It nodded again, very slowly and deliberately.

"Okay, okay. I'm letting you out."

The moment the rat touched the ground, though, it ran. Off the bridge, into the shadows, and out of Link's sight. He stood there for a moment, just staring, trying not to cry.

"Well, I really did need you." He finally signed to the dark, as if it could understand him, then turned to walk away.

He stopped when he heard the sound of tiny feet pattering on the cobblestones. Could it?

There was the rat, sitting there, looking up at him. 

"You... Came back?"

It nodded.

"You came to help me?"

Another nod.

"Then let's... Let's go back, I guess." Link reached down, offering it his hand.

Hesitantly, it stepped up onto his hand, sitting down in his palm. Link lifted his hand, took a deep breath, and started back.

***

"How will we do this?" Link signed to the rat once they got back, having set it down on the dumpster lid. "I don't..."

He picked it back up again, offering it a spot in his shirt. It shook its hand first, but-

The back door burst open, and the rat jumped into the shirt without another complaint. Its hands were cold, but Link didn't dare move. Mr. Hyrule was staring straight at him.

"Y-yes?"

"It appears you didn't tell the whole truth, Link." He said, taking a step forward. "Where did you study?"

"What do you mean?"

"The soup. It's incredible." Mr Hyrule stated. "Where did you learn how to cook?"

It was good? Apparently the rat didn't lie about knowing how to cook.

"I just... Here?"

He shook his head, then stepped back inside. "Well, at any rate... You'll need to recreate the soup if you want to stay here. Revali will teach you how things work around here-"

"I-?" The blue haired one, Revali, apparently, looked borderline betrayed. 

The surprise on his face immediately buttered, turning into a rough scowl.

"Take as much time as you need." Mr. Hyrule gave a sly smile, then walked right back to his office.

Link turned to Revali. "Well, I guess I'm-"

"No. Don't be happy about this just because you got a job here. You'll be gone within the week, let me assure you of that. Now I am technically in charge of training you, but I am not letting you get in the way of my career. Understood?"

He nodded.

"Good. Keep washing dishes, your training starts for real tomorrow morning."

Link swallowed, his whole body feeling numb as he washed the dishes. He could feel everyone's eyes on him, as if they burned right through his jacket and saw the rat hiding underneath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: Link is absolutely not a loser because he is autistic. This is his point of view and he's really hard on himself, so I'm just making sure we're all on the same page with that.
> 
> I'm on Tumblr at Supertinywords and Supertinydom! 
> 
> Comments are love <3


	3. Midna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Midna and Link need to learn how to cook together - being in his shirt was not going to work. The real questions was, did they have any better ideas...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic will come out, I believe, on Mondays and Wednesday's! The rest of the week will be for other things, I promise <3

Midna was expecting Link, as she had learned his name was, to leave her right outside the restaurant so she could fend for herself that night. She expected him to want nothing to do with her except when they were working, and she was fine with that. They would only meet near the restaurant.

She couldn't have been more wrong.

After they finished cleaning up for the night, Link let her out into his hand, then placed her carefully into the basket of his bike. Being so out of control was scary, having to rely on Link for moving around, but the basket wasn't bad. It was a lot better in here than hiding in Link's shirt, for certain. There wasn't a lot of room in there, mostly just little gaps here and there. She could still breathe and move around, but it wasn't pleasant, to say the least. They had to figure out something else.

Speaking of which - how was she supposed to make Link cook? It wasn't like she could cook, and then just pretend he did it. People would see her. How...

The bike stopped, and Link got off to lead it up to his apartment. Midna liked this even less, if possible. Not being in control like this...

Carefully, judging the distances just like she had back in the kitchen at home, she jumped up out of the basket, travelled along the bike, and climbed up Link's arm onto his shoulder. Better, at the very least.

They made it up into his apartment, barely jamming the bike in the door, and went on inside. Link immediately flopped down on his couch, unbuttoning the tight chef's jacket. Midna hopped off his shoulder, running over to sit on the arm of the couch.

"So... What now?" Link signed, his eyebrows furrowed. "Do we...?"

Midna shrugged, trying to say: "We need to learn how to cook together somehow, but I don't know how."

"Well, we can't just-"

But she could at least see his kitchen, that might help. Midna hopped down onto the couch seat, then onto the floor. The apartment was basically one room, just a curtain separating them from the bathroom, but...  
She caught sight of what looked like a kitchen, though, and made her way over there. It was small, like the rest of the apartment, but...

"Here." Link signed, reaching down to pick her up. 

She climbed into his hand, then right off the moment she was close enough to a countertop.

"So... We should practice coking?" Link took a deep breath, then nodded. 

Midna nodded back.

He swallowed. "Back in the shirt then?"

There was no way. She did not want to, she really didn't think that would work, but... Wrinkling her nose, her whole body protesting, she nodded.

"I'll... Try to get a bigger jacket?"

Feeling repetitive and getting impatient, once more Midna nodded.

"Okay, let's... Try to do this, I guess."

Hopping back into the shirt wasn't as bad the second time, knowing what to expect, even after Link re-buttoned his shirt. So, he started trying to cook.   
They walked over to the refrigerator, opened the door, and immediately he tried to reach for a tomato. Even from this distance, Midna could tell it was no good. It smelled sour and slightly rotten; it wasn't quite spoiled, but definitely close.

So, she did the only thing she could think of: she bit him.

Link yelped, dropping the tomato immediately and reaching for the other one. At least that worked, and this one smelled better. But now he was trying to get a pepper out, and none of them smelled good... Midna kept biting, and he kept trying to grab another one. Finally he gave up, reaching for the eggs. These were fine, probably, except...

After he set the eggs down and opened the carton, she could tell one of them had been broken already and wasn't good. And, of course, Link tried to reach for that one...

So she bit him again, and this time Link gave up. He took a full step back, unbuttoned the shirt, grabbed her, and set her back down on the counter. He lifted up his undershirt, revealing half a dozen little red bite marks on his torso.

Immediately, his hand flew up to his hair, rubbing the long piece between his fingers.

"This isn't going to work." Link stared, scowling, looking down at his body in disbelief. "I can't cook and act normal in a kitchen while you're in my shirt, biting, and scratching, and- and- I can't do this!"

Eyes wide, ears straight up, she nodded again.

"So, what can we do..." He held out his hand again for her to get on and, carefully, she climbed on once more, climbing up to his shoulder. 

But they had left the eggs and the tomato out on the counter. Trying to get his attention, Midna yanked on the loose lock of hair that came down to his shoulder.

And, immediately, Link spun around. Faster than she had seen him move before he walked to the kitchen and set down his hand on the counter, letting her climb off. 

"How did you do that!?" He signed, eyes wide, has dropped. "It was like, like..."

She shrugged.

"You don't know?"

Nope, not at all, she thought to herself as she shook her head. 

"But that... That could work! Here, climb up on my head." Link ducked down, lowering his head to counter level.

Hesitantly, taking a deep breath, Midna did as he said. It was certainly nicer up here, with less sweaty body, more air, and Link's slightly slippery, soft hair under her paws. She could get used to this.

Especially if it worked.

Grabbing two locks of hair in each paw, she pulled on the left.

Involuntarily, Link's arm shot up into the air. The same thing happened when she tried it on the right.

But what if she didn't pull so hard? His hand came about halfway up, this time bending at the elbow. 

Could they make this work?

Grabbing a more central bunch of hair, Midna tried to guide him into taking a step forward... Except it was too far forward, coming up all the way directly touching the counter, nearly stubbing his toes.

But, she supposed his would do. Carefully, trying to tug as gently as possible, she led his hand over to one egg. Immediately, once she tried to get him to pick it up, he crushed it in his hand.

Link winced beneath her, making a little noise. He reached for a towel, wiping off the mess from his hand.

But they tried again. And again. And again until five of the down eggs were broken, Link's hand was disgusting, and Midna was starting to lose patience. But the last one.

They got the last one.

Midna could have cheered, she was so happy. But now... 

She tried her best to guide his hand over, to gently set the egg on the counter-

Broken. Instantly, he crushed it all over the kitchen counter.

Midna groaned. This was about to be a long night.

***

One trip to the grocery store, several bandaids, and a couple hours later, they both had omelets. They weren't good enough at cooking for it to actually be passable, but... It was a good start. And now they would have dinner. That was important. About an hour in she had started to feel the hunger making her cranky, and that was not a good combination with the fact she had someone else's hair in her paws.

"Wow, this is really good." Link signed with his mouth full, smiling as well as he could. "How do you just... Know how to do that?"

Midna shrugged, then pointed to her nose.

"You smell it?"

She nodded.

"I guess that makes sense, since you're a rat, but... Still, that's pretty incredible." Link only paused to stuff his face with more eggs. "You're amazing."

Midna, proud, nodded... But it still wasn't good enough. She couldn't face Rhoam until he could actually cook. So...

Shoving the rest of her omelet in her mouth, she got to work. Getting down off the counter was very similar to back home, but finding something in this apartment that would work as...

A tie. Perfect. Midna hopped back up onto the couch, grabbed it from on top of his tiny TV, and ran back to the kitchen.

Link gave her a puzzled look. "What do you want me to go with a...?"

She held it up over her eyes, then looked back at him.

"You want me to be blindfolded?" He asked, eyes wide. "While you control me?"

Another nod.

"Okay, I guess we've-" He swallowed. "Got to get used to this..."

Midna took a deep breath. Yeah, this was about to be a very, very long night. But Link tied it on tight enough, let her back up onto his head, and they got back to work.

***

Night ended up not being too accurate; it was morning before they were anywhere close to confident, and by then Link was ready to pass out from exhaustion. Midna could tell just by his reactions. To be fair, she was pretty tired too. And with work starting in just a few hours, they both needed all the sleep they could get.

Which is why, apparently, Midna wasn't going to be able to fall asleep at all. 

Thoughts just kept racing through her mind, everything that had happened that day replaying... This was not where she had seen herself at the end of this. When she finally got up the courage to leave the sewer, to jump up to where the light was coming from, the daylight had been blinding. People moving by, loud noises, cars, everything had been so overwhelming that she had nearly fallen back down again. A thousand scents, cloaked by the damp smell of underground, hit her nose at once. Fresh bread, cheese, fruit, simmering sauces from restaurants, sweet pastry creams from bakeries. 

Midna crawled out of the gutter, rushing over to the side of the street. Her main goal, right now, was finding something to eat. She was starving, and...  
Down a nearby alleyway was a dumpster, the contents of which didn't smell as bad as some other things around. Scavenging like this would be dangerous during the day, so dumpster was probably her best bet.

From snatching food literally off a lady's counter, to looking through dumpsters. Definitely not an upgrade.

But there was decent enough food there: bread that was a little old, and some vegetables that probably weren't quite good enough for restaurant standards. It was a good meal, and tasted better for having been hungry down underground for so long. 

But she had gotten curious: what restaurant was this? It wouldn't hurt to look around, as long as she wasn't caught... But that would require getting somewhere higher up.

Good thing climbing was one of her specialties.

It didn't take long to find a building she'd have a view from, one she could worm her way up without anyone noticing. It was an old apartment building, with a murky smell and possibly worse looking exterior. But run-down meant easy for a rat to navigate her way up, so she supposed she was grateful. Though, as she passed through the rooms... Never mind, she'd rather not think about all the things she saw and heard. It wasn't great, that was for certain. 

But inside the walls was easy to climb, with pipes and exposed wood bits. She just kept climbing higher and higher, until there she could see a hole up, higher in the wall. There were pipes close enough to it, so...

Jumping up to one after the other, fast as she could, Midna made it up to the gap. Her paws struggled to get a grip on that last spot, but as soon as she looked out-

Her jaw dropped.

Guard!?

Chef Wilde's restaurant, the one and only Guard. That meant-

"I've been in under Paris this whole time?" Midna couldn't help but giggle, then laugh.

Paris. The food capital of the world, and she had been right underneath it reading Chef Wilde's cookbook. And here was his restaurant - she ate out of his dumpster!

Except... He was dead. Something about this victory felt a little hollow, and that must have been why. It was different without him.

But she could still get down closer. Scrambling back down the wall, while less safe than going up, went a whole lot faster. Before long she was back down at the bottom, ready to see if there were any windows to see into the kitchen. If only...  
Midna got closer and closer to the building, circling it before finally catching sight of a window. An open one, nonetheless! She would be able to heard everything going on inside, too.

Pinching herself to wake up, in case this was just a dream, Midna hopped on a bicycle, then a dumpster to get up to where the window was.

And that was the kitchen. Her attention was captivated, immediately listing off the positions she had memorized, matching them with each cook. The saucier, with her long red hair and impressive height. The pastry chef, with his white beard in a net to keep hair out of the food. The sous chef, with a round face and blonde hair. A garbage boy in an ill-fitting jacket, scrubbing pots and pans. The head chef, a tall man with a severe look, ordering everything around.

It was incredible. This was the legacy of her hero. How could this get any-

Midna's eyes went wide, all of her attention suddenly sucked back to the garbage boy. He was... Tasting the food? No, just smelling it. That was... Odd, but-

Clang!

The pot got knocked over, red soup all over the floor. Instantly the garbage boy was on it, picking it back up, putting it on the burner, mopping up the soup... But it was too late. A lot of the soup sloshed onto the floor; there was nothing he could do about that. This boy was fired, that was for sure.

No one had noticed yet, sure...

Then he made it worse. Midna watched intently as he glanced around, looked back and the soup, and-

"No!"

She couldn't help but yell out, nearly pulling out her fur as she watched him try to cook. Pouring in chicken stalk, basil, whole cloves of garlic, turmeric, cumin - she could smell the disaster mounting the more ingredients he added. 

You could fix it, a voice in her head whispered. You know how.

"Not the whole cloves of garlic!" She argued. "That's unfixable."

But could she just sit here and watch as he walked away, leaving that horrid soup?

The saucier walked back, took one look at the soup and knew it wasn't right. She took a taste, and instantly panic was all over her face. Fumbling over to the trash can, she barely managed to not spit it out.

Right away she went back to the Head Chef's office.

Now was her time. She couldn't stop the garbage boy from getting fired, but she could cook. This was her opportunity. Her time.

Midna had to admit though, it felt like she wasn't thinking as she ran in, darting across counters, hiding in shadows, making it over to the saucier's station without getting caught. 

Now, the good part began.

First she washed her hands. Then she just let her nose, and her knowledge of Chef Wilde's cooking guide her. Cream and salt and pepper, a dash of olive oil, a littering a different spices., vegetables, ingredients. She lost herself in the cooking, adding whatever it needed, jumping down from the shelf to stir...

And that's when she saw the garbage boy, staring straight at her. 

Flashbacks on the old lady's house jumped through her mind, but neither of them moved. Then, the impossible happened. He took the ladle in his hand, stirred it again, and went to taste.  
Unfortunately, at the same time came bursting in the head chef. He yelled at this garbage boy, letting him have it, and Midna found herself unable to move. She had always been separate from others, to a degree, never really close to anyone else, but... She had a connection with this garbage boy. He didn't say a word, just went to try the soup.

He was interested in her food. She, a rat. That was-

"Rat!" The head chef yelled, and the whole kitchen went into a panic.

Midna darted for the window, but it was so far away now, and there were so many chefs between. She could almost make it, heart pounding, adrenaline pumping, almost-

A colander dropped down over her head like the bars of a trap, halting her near escape. 

Her heart sunk down in her chest, as the inevitable truth slowly became reality. She would die in this kitchen. All her life she wanted to be here, to cook, to meet Chef Wilde - obviously that one wasn't possible anymore, but... Still. She had done that, but was it enough?

No. She was still hungry for this, metaphorically. She wanted it. To cook. To live. To breathe. She was in Paris! What more could a rat want?

The colander was lifted, but before she could run a glass jar was brought down over her head. Tumbling into the wall, she was flipped over, slamming down hard on her back.

All of the chefs were looking at her. At the garbage boy holding the jar, loosely holding the kid overtop so she could still breathe.

A glimmer of hope arose in her. Why would he hold it like that, if he planned to kill her? Maybe she had a chance after all. 

But he had walked out, and, strangely enough, signed to her. And at first she just wanted to run, to get away on her own, not caring one but about this dumb garbage boy who just happened to mess up a soup bad enough for her to intervene. But as she ran away...

He tried her soup. For the first time in her life, someone took her cooking seriously. He wanted it. 

He thought she could cook.

So she ran back, and they cooked, and what a disaster that was. 

But now? She wasn't so sure. Maybe, just maybe, they were onto something here.

Midna fell asleep, finally, tired but hopeful.


	4. Link

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Link has learned how to cook with the rat, but... Has he learned how to make her stay? And with stress mounting in the kitchen, now is not the time to start making eyes at one of the other chefs...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's Monday! Happy Pride month, y'all <3

When Link's alarm blared the next morning, he barely rolled out of bed. Why was it even going off this early? Except...

Wait. It wasn't early, he was just up late with the-

The rat! Where was he? Link paused. She? It? He didn't have time to think about the proper pronoun to use for the rat, he just needed to find... Her.

The refrigerator was open. As soon as Link saw that his eyes went wide, heart freezing in panic.

She left. They went through all that, learning how to cook with a rat pulling on his hair, only for her to steal food and leave. It made sense, sure, but... He didn't want it to be true. He wanted to go to work together and figure out how to recreate the soup. This, being on his own...

Well, he supposed he wouldn't even have this job anymore, and what then? He spent way more on groceries than he should have, if he didn't have a paycheck coming. And he wouldn't, if he couldn't recreate the soup...

Taking a deep breath, shoving all of that to the back burner, Link started his routine. Quick shower, toweling off thoroughly because being wet is the worst feeling, brushing through his hair...  
Breakfast, which led him to the fact that the refrigerator door was probably still open. Shit.

Throwing on his bathrobe, Link stepped out to close it and get some breakfast, but... It was already closed? What could-?

There, very carefully pivoting a spatula on the edge of a frying pan, putting a tiny omelet on the counter, was the rat. Still here. Link could have cried tears of joy, relief, anything.  
And on the plate, next to the tiny omelet she had clearly made for herself, was a larger one.

"Did you... Make me breakfast?" Link asked, sure his eyes were still wide with amazement.

She nodded, then gestured for him to come join her.

"Thank you, I..."

Again, she nodded, then thwacked a fork closer to him with her tail. Taking the hint this time, he dug in.

Link hummed, instantly smiling. He hadn't had a breakfast this good since... Well, since he was a kid, and his mom cooked breakfast sometimes before she went to work. Just the taste, even though it was much fancier than anything she would have made back then, had him bouncing on his feet with joy.

Speaking of it being fancier, though... "What did you put in this?"

The rat shoved another bite of her tiny little omelet in her mouth, then hopped over to the window. Pointing with her face, she indicated the little herb garden on his neighbors balcony.

Link blanched. That neighbor had yelled at him for just looking at her wrong, once. If she realized a rat was stealing her herbs for him...

That sounded ridiculous, but she would believe it, and she would be angry.

"Okay, I'll get some herbs. No need to steal, right?"

The rat, seeming to understand, nodded.

"Wait, we need to go!" Link shoved the rest of his omelet into his mouth, savoring it as much as he could with the speed, before haphazardly throwing on his work uniform. It still didn't fit well, but his toque would hide the rat, which would certainly make the jacket less tight.

"You ready?"

She nodded. Link held out his hand and she jumped on, climbing up to his shoulder while he dislodged his bike from the entryway. Once they got out he put her in the basket and started off for work.

Link found himself running on a high, almost. Things were weird, they had never been weirder, but you know what? That wasn't a bad thing. And right now, it seemed good.

***

When Link got to the kitchen, sneaking in through the back door, the rat hidden under his toque, Revali was waiting for him. There he was, leaning casually against the counter, lips pressed into a tight line, staring at his nails.

"Well, about time." He scoffed, trying to make eye contact; Link glanced away. "I should have gotten your number so you could show up earlier; I hate wasting prep time, especially when it's being spent on someone wasting my time. So let's get started, yes?"

All Link could do was nod.

"Alright, vegetables. Here's a head of lettuce, break it down for me." Revali demanded, passing over the produce. "Or do you even know which knife to use?"

He shook his head.

"And I have to train this-" He let out a breath slowly, through his nose. "Chef's knife. Standard, reliable, good for most anything you'll be doing in here. Who's your best friend in this kitchen?"

Link paused, then hesitantly pointed. "You?"

"Absolutely not, it's the knife. Hold it like this-" Revali used his hands, all long fingers and practical callous, to guide Link's hand into the correct position. "So you get the best leverage. Put your other hand on top of the blade and chop."

The rat forced his hands down, chopping clean through the end of the lettuce. He stopped, turning to look at Revali.

Revali narrowed his, incredibly green, eyes, making Link feel three inches tall. "Well then? Keep going. We don't have all day."

The rat took charge again, controlling Link's hands so completely that it made him nervous. Just watching himself, moving involuntarily, with that sharp of a knife was terrifying. And things were only about to get worse from here.

"Not bad, but not good." Revali finally declared after they finished, crossing his arms. "Good enough for some things, at the very least... Would you look at me when I talk to you?"

Shit. This always happened eventually, it seemed like...

"I... Can't." Link admitted, holding his breath.

Revali frowned a little deeper, opening his mouth, and then promptly deciding to shut it. "Fine, just work on getting faster, alright?"

He nodded.

In front of Revali was the same thing, a head of chopped lettuce done much quicker and much more evenly. Clearly, he was being serious: Link really was just slowing him down.

"Alright, now put that all into here, and we'll each do another one." Revali scraped it all into a container, and got them to work on the next.

Letting the control go completely to the rat, just watching what was going on, Link got started with what appeared to be a really long day.

***

"What, are you expecting your mom to come along and clean this all up for you?" Revali stood, arms crossed, one eyebrow raised, looking at Link like he wasn't just the garbage boy, he was the garbage itself.

"What do you-"

"Station. Clear." He smiled, more like baring teeth; it was kind of beautiful, but in the most petrifying way Link could imagine. "Thanks to you we don't have a full time dish washer, but we still have one most of the time. So take all of this shit-"

Revali piled up the pots and pans and dishes in the blink of an eye. Link had a hard time catching up, just watching him create a pile, pick it up, and walk over to the sink. He dumped it all in with a small crashing noise, brushed off his hands on his apron, and glared directly down at Link. 

"Messy station means a messy mind, messy life. I can already tell that describes you as a person, but not in this kitchen. Understand?"

"I understand." His hands finally stuttered out.

"Good. Now what... Your sleeves are disgusting." 

Link cocked his head to the side. "What?"

"Your sleeves! Look at that." Revali grabbed his arm, holding it out to display the mess on his sleeves.

Link turned beet red. The look on his face was so disappointed... He couldn't help the feeling that he was t going to last another day in the kitchen. But, of course, the rat was the one in control right now, so...

"Disgusting. Absolutely deplorable." He clicked his tongue. "Hold your arms in like this. See your arms? Still unmarked, soft, and pretty. See mine?"

Pushing back his sleeves revealed his long, thin arms, scattered with scars of different ages and types: burns, large cuts, stabs, little cuts on his fingers - everything. 

Link would be lying if he said it wasn't a little impressive... And a little attractive, in a scary way.

He pushed his sleeves back down, frowning. "Scarred from years in the kitchen holding my arms wrong. Keeping your arms in allows for neater movements, cleaner stations, and it minimizes cuts and burns. That's how you notice a true chef: their apron is messy, but their sleeves are clean."

Link nodded. 

"Good. Now, back to work. There's time yet before closing."

***

Service hadn't even started yet, and Link was sure he was going to die. This was it; this was what kept him from being a chef. Well, that and the fact that he didn't really know how to cook, he was basically just a human puppet at the mercies of a little rat chef puppet master. But this? This was too far.

"Are you even paying attention?" Revali asked in that same dismissive, condescending tone he always used, holding his chef's knife like the most casual thing in the world. "Now you need to cut down either side of the breastbone..."

Link got so lost watching him break down the chicken, he nearly vomited twice and forgot what part they were working on more often than that. Part of him just thought of the chickens he had raised for a while, and... No. He couldn't do it. He ate chicken, but this? Hit a little close to home.

"There. Simple." Revali took a step back. "Now you do it."

And involuntarily, he stepped forward. Hands shaking, lower lip quivering, absolutely in full blown knee knocking terror. The only thing keeping Link from bolting, from going and hiding in the walk-in fridge and having a complete nervous breakdown, was the rat in his hat. She had her shit together, and he trusted her on that.

But being able to cook good soup, or a good omelet, wasn't an indication of how well you could break down a chicken. Suddenly, he was nervous again.

But they did it. Piece by piece, bone by bone, they got through it. It sure as hell wasn't quick, and Link had to shut his eyes a couple of times, but...

"You actually did it. I'm impressed."

Link's heart soared.

"You're not a complete imbecile after all." Revali added, in true Revali fashion. "Now come on, we need to make the marinade for these wings."

And he was back to being cold. That seemed to be how Revali was: hot and cold all the time, mostly grouchy but occasionally... Sweet. Almost nice, but not quite. Like a cinnamon flavored candy. He didn't quite know. How to describe it, but...

All Link knew, was that he was falling for it. Hard. Watching him slice vegetables, perfect every time in paper thin slices, was a religious experience. Seeing him cook in three different pans at once with ease. Noticing the little things he does with his face, the furrow of his brows in concentration, the pursing of his lips with annoyance, the clench of his jaw any time Mr. Hyrule spoke - over time he started to get an idea of Revali:

Authority wasn't his favorite thing; he'd rather be doing things on his own. Neatness wasn't just something he needed in his kitchen, but it seemed like in his life, too. He didn't like wearing his toque. He talked in a condescending way, but he talked like that to everyone. Despite how annoyed he was with everything and anything, if Link set a boundary - like eye contact - he followed it to a T.

Link was still scared shitless by him, but... He was beautiful. It took three days of hard work in the kitchen and lots of yelling to be able to notice that, but he really was. His long blue hair was always tied back in tight braid or two, with electric green hair ties at the end of them. His brows were perfect, always arched just right, so expressive. Any time something happened, you could just look at his brows to see how he was feeling. There was a startling feeling to his green eyes, always shocking Link to the core. His nose resembled a bit of a beak, the curve of it perfectly suiting his face.

Then his lips, with the perfect cupid's bow and the little way he bites the lower lip when he's really concentrating-

"Link? Hello?" Revali waved a hand in front of his face. "You can't be half asleep in the kitchen. Drink an energy drink, take a moment in the walk in, but do not. Be. Napping. Am I understood?"

Link nodded.

"Good; take a moment to wake up, I have fryers to check. And remember: don't do anything I wouldn't do or I'll slit your throat. Capiche?"

He nodded again.

"You're getting your own station tomorrow, but still not cooking for the restaurant, just prep work and recreating that soup. I personally don't know why Rhoam has wasted so much effort and talent on you, but... Be worthy of that. Or...?" He gestured for Link to finish.

"Or you'll either kill me, stab me, or leave in in the walk in to slowly freeze to death?"

Revali clapped; a rare, but scary, smile blossomed on his face. "Great guesses, and all accurate. Now get to it!"

Link scampered back to Revali's station, as fast as his rat-controlled feet would allow it. He was finally getting used to this. It was strange, but, after a while... It wasn't so bad. The kitchen's structure was easy for him to catch on to, even if the actual skills weren't. The rat's puppetry was getting better; they even peeled and prepared calamari today. Much better than they had been this week, even with Revali teaching them. Delicate knife work that had Link sweating buckets was just that easy for her. It was incredible.

And now, he would get his own station... Technically, that didn't mean much. It just mean a little bit of counter and a little bit of stovetop space that were allotted to him, so that he could focus on replicating the soup. When they got home, they would need to work on that. Getting that soup figured out was critical to keeping this job.

And Link didn't want to go. Not just because he needed a job, but because this job had proven to be so special. Well, that, and...

Revali.

Forcing his eyes away from that amazing, beautiful, talented chef, Link went back to letting the rat take control.

Speaking of which, she would need a name...

***

When they got back to the apartment, and when Link got his bike back in the door, he immediately started looking around for paper and something to write with. They would have to write down the soup recipe, and...

Link set the rat down on the counter. "Do you know how to read?"

She nodded.

"Do you think you can make me write?" 

After a moments pause, and a few glances over at the pencil and torn-out notebook paper, she nodded. 

"Then, I don't know if this is how it works for... Rats, but... do you have a name?"

She nodded again.

"And you think you could make me write the soup recipe, too?"

Her paw wavered back and forth, like she was trying to say "so-so."

"Okay then, do you wanna...?" Link held out his hand, offering her a way up. 

The rat hopped into his hand, all hesitation she had in the past long abandoned, and Link lifted her up to his head. As soon as he did, it was like they were back in kitchen mode now. Link didn't need to worry about what he was doing; the rat was in control.

That sounded so strange.

Immediately she went for the pencil, picking it up backward at first, but flipping it back around with surprising dexterity. Then, ever so slowly, she began to write. Each letter was a struggle, and Link never knew what was coming next.

M. 

Wait, he hadn't stopped to think about it: animals already have names. Or, at least rats do. Do they have long names? Short names? Would they be here all night with trying to spell it out? What kind of name sign would he give her, and a better question: why hasn't he already given her one?

Did chickens have names already?

Mi.

What if her name was just "Mi"? Would she take offense if he called her Mimi, or would it be a cute nickname?

Mid.

Mid. That would be quite the interesting name. It wasn't quite a good name, but it wasn't quite a bad name. It was about mid-way through. Link had to hold back laughter, even though the joke wasn't funny.

Midn.

That was one he wasn't sure how to pronounce, and it was seeming more likely than ever that rats have long names.

Midna.

That was a nice name; Link lied that. Midna. Somehow it suited her. Maybe because it sounded like Midnight and she was a black rat, but that was fine.

Midnas.

Multiple, or was the name still going?

Midnash.

Mid-Nash. Like, midway through gnashing your teeth. Interesting...?

Midnashe.

Mid-nashy? Was it still just Mid-Nash?

But then she added the parentheses, and it all made sense. 

Midna (she)

Carefully, Link let Midna back down to the counter. 

"So, your name is Midna?" He finger-spelled out the name in full.

She nodded.

"And you use she/her pronouns?"

Another nod.

"Well, that made me realize I never, like, actually introduced myself to you, did I?"

Midna shook her head.

"I'm Link, I use he and him pronouns, and, uh... It's nice to meet you formally?"

She made a little squeaky noise, almost like a laugh. Link couldn't help the grin that broke out on his face.

"Well, okay Midna. Do you have a good idea of what's in the soup?"

Midna shrugged, then nodded.

"Alright, time to write it down then. Back up on my head..."

***

Link tapped Revali on the arm. "Can you taste this?"

It was the next day, a couple hours into the afternoon, before service, and Link was pretty sure they perfected the soup. It smelled right, it looked right, it tasted amazing, even though Link never got an opportunity to taste the original so he wouldn't know if it was right or not. Actually, it was probably better since it never went through the phase of tasting like garbage-vomit water.  
But Revali had tasted the original, so he would know if it tasted the same.

And if they got it right, everything they did was meticulously written down. In awful handwriting, sure, Link's fine motor skills were never fantastic and being controlled by a ra- Midna. Being controlled by Midna didn't exactly make it better, but that was fine. What mattered was that it could be replicated by Urbosa, the saucier. She was scary, but nice, and some days she came into work with crazy colored lipstick. 

Revali tidied up what he was doing very quickly, then turned back to Link. "Is it the soup?"

He nodded.

"And you think it's right?"

"As close as I can guess, right now."

"Then let me get myself a bowl, practically. But first, I need to see that it's perfect..." 

Revali came over to the soup, taking in the scent before actually dipping a spoon in, blowing on it, and tasting it. Link watched in anticipation, waiting for his reaction.   
One hand came up to cover his mouth, a little smile just visible on his lips despite it. He nodded slowly, like he was just taking in the flavor.

"That's perfection." Revali declared after tasting the soup. "Congratulations, you actually did it."

Link grinned. "Did you think I could?"

"No."

He nodded. That was fair, but-

Revali laughed, genuine, shaking his head. "I'm joking, idiot. I didn't think you would at first, but... You're a fast learner. And you listen."

"So... It's soup-erb?"

He snorted. "Okay, okay... Back to work."

Link thought briefly about all the times he totally tuned out of whatever Revali was saying, just watching his lips move, his eyelashes flutter against his cheek, the way the curve of his neck looked as he did things around the kitchen. Regardless of all of that, though, Midna had him nod.

"Now, let's see how you handle real restaurant stress, yes?"


	5. Midna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Midna is pleased with her new position as an actual chef in the kitchen, even if Link is using the opportunity to flirt. 
> 
> And it's Link's day off, which means Midna has some time to herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, Wednesday!

After all that, Midna was finally working as a chef on the job for real. Her only training from Revali was in the mornings or afternoons, when they're prepping. She was learning so much in such a little time that sometimes her mind felt ready to explode, but it was good. She was really getting the hang of it, and it showed.

Of course, not all of it was her. The way Link blushed and signed to Revali... That was all him. Midna could care less about romance right now, but it was obvious he was interested. How well that would play out in the long run, working in the kitchen together... She had no clue.   
And while he was just trying to learn about Revali, she was trying to pick up on the whole staff of the kitchen.

"Now that you're actually working with us, you'll need to at least remember their names. See, over there-" Revali pointed over at the saucier. "That's Urbosa. She grew up in a rough neighborhood, adopted all of her sisters and cousins when she got old enough, and started working here to pay for it. There's no one better at soups and sauces, even if you think yours was all that."

"And there, our pastry chef? That's Mipha. She was born rich, her daddy's a big corporation owner. But she didn't just pay her way in here, oh no. She'll cook circles around anyone who questions her ability." He looked back at Link and Midna, just to make sure they were tracking, then kept on. "And you met Daruk the first day. Another one working here to support family. Ask him about his past jobs sometime and he'll give you a good story - just don't mention anything to do with dogs."

Link nodded, and Midna held tight to his hair so she didn't slip off. That would be... Bad. For both of them. Every time Link moved on his own she was worried about sliding off, or his hat getting knocked off.

"And that's Zelda, sous chef. You know what the funniest thing is? Her father is head chef Rhoam, but that's not even close to how she got this job. He doesn't even want her working here."

Midna tipped Link's head to the side, hoping he would look confused enough to warrant more information.

"Chef Wilde knew her when she was younger, and he promised her that if she was still cooking when she was an adult, she would have a job here. Worked her way up the ranks so well even her father couldn't deny her the position."

Link signed something, his hands quick and nervous like they always were around Revali.

Revali laughed. "I'm an incredible cook, with amazing skill and talent, who has every single one of Chef Wilde's recipes memorized. Isn't that enough?"

Midna could feel him shrug beneath her.

"But now, the important question: what holds us all together?"

He shrugged again, and Midna caught a glimpse of his reflection as he signed a familiar word. "Kitchen?"

Revali shook his head. "No, not just the kitchen. The passion, the drive for food, for creating. We're all here because we want to be, because we fought for it. People make being chef into a boring job, or one of simple service, but when you think about it... We are the trendsetters. The rebels, the ones who have worked for all that we have and we still don't fit in. That's what binds us together."

"Us?"

"Of course. You're one of us, aren't you? A nonverbal chef who started as a garbage boy trying to cook, and turned out to be a prodigy?" He smiled a rare smile, sweet, filling his eyes with a softness and a warmth; then it was back to business. "Alright now; back to work. I've wasted enough time talking."

Turning him away from Revali to get back to work wasn't easy, but Midna managed. Their knife skills together had gotten a whole lot better, especially since Revali taught her how she should keep Link's hands. It was convoluted, but it worked. As he sliced leeks for the stew, though... Midna's mind started to wander.

What was going on with Rhoam?

For one, he never seemed to be in the kitchen, which was strange for a head chef. With their waiter expediting she supposed it wasn't that odd, but... Still, it definitely wasn't right. She'd barely even seen him cook!

Two, why didn't he want his daughter to be a chef? Clearly, watching Zelda, she was one of the most skilled in the room. It made no sense at all to see that kind of talent and still want to deny her a job she wanted to do. Anyone should be free to pursue their passion like this.

And third, he was acting... Strange. From giving her a 'deadline' on the soup, to how he flew off the rails at chefs, to the sickly smile he gave Link... It was odd. It was all just too odd to be a coincidence.

But what was going on with him?

"Link! Get your mind into it! What did I say about nodding off?"

Midna made him nod then got right back to work, for real this time.

***

Link had the night off tonight, which meant Midna was going on a walk around town. Since getting here it felt like life had been thrown at her a million miles an hour, so it was nice to just have some time to herself, to relax.

As soon as she was by herself, though, it started to feel lonely. She started thinking about things back home, in the basement of the old lady's house. Pestering Navi until she went to go get Fi. Tatl and Tael's constant shenanigans. Watching Zant throw tantrums over decisions that were in her authority to make when he couldn't do a thing about it. 

Actually, never mind. She didn't miss Zant. 

But getting to be around them, the whole colony, just...  
Before long, she had wandered back to Guard. It was family, in a way, their group of chefs. But they didn't know it was her. They just met Link with her cooking skills, so it wasn't really like-

A rustling noise from a paper bag on the ground had Midna jumping back, grabbing the closest thing to her to use as a weapon: a discarded fish bone. Whatever it was in there, it sounded around her size. Adrenaline rushed through her veins as she stepped forward, ready to deal with whoever...

"Midna?"

She froze. It knew her name? And it sounded like-

"Navi?"

"Midna! You're still alive!" Navi jumped out of the bag, ears perked all the way up, jumping and wriggling with excitement. "I can't believe it, I can't believe it! I was so worried, and- are you okay?"

She laughed, relief overcoming her whole body. "I'm good, really."

"That's- where have you been? We have to tell the colony!" 

The colony. They were here. Oh shit.

Midna froze. "I mean... Maybe another time?"

Navi tilted her head to the side. "What do you mean? You're alive! Everyone should know!"

"Yes, but..."

"Don't tell me you're doing crazy stuff again."

Of all the things Navi had called 'crazy stuff,' riding around on top of a human's head to control him, making him cook, and working in a three star restaurant definitely was the craziest, so she kept her mouth shut.

"Midna, what have you been doing?"

"It's all been safe... Sort of safe."

"Sort of safe?" Navi's hairs stood straight up. "From you that means like, totally ridiculously dangerous. What have you..."

They both looked up at the restaurant.

"No."

"It's not like I've been living there!" Midna argued, sitting up straighter. "I've been perfectly safe."

"Being that close to humans? Zant would have a fit." Navi pointed out. "It's not safe."

"I don't give a damn what Zant thinks, okay?" She scowled. "I'm here because I want to be; do you want to be a part of that, or not?"

Navi stopped for a moment, then sighed. "I'm just glad you're okay."

Midna let her shoulders relax. "I'm glad you're all okay, too... What were you doing in that bag?"

"Eating." She walked back over to the bag, tearing it open to reveal the crusty remains of what could have been someone's lunch, a couple days ago. "You want some?"

"You weren't... Actually eating that."

"Some of us aren't picky like you."

Midna gagged. "You're... Serious?"

Navi scowled, padding back over to Midna. "Then what have you been eating?"

She really shouldn't get her food, but... Navi was practically family, the closest thing she had to a sister.

"Follow me."

Midna led her up onto the ledge, and in through the window she came through her first day in the kitchen. It was always open, for some reason. Maybe it got too hot in the kitchen? She had never really noticed, beyond how sweaty it got inside Link's toque. Whatever it was, it was convenient.

"Hey! Are you sure about this?"

"Of course I'm sure. You trust me, right?"

"Honestly? I don't know." Navi grumbled, still following her. "But if someone sees us..."

"No one will see us, they all went home for the night." Midna explained, hopping down off the counter. 

"How do you know that?"

"Because I've... Watched them. I noticed that they all left." She nodded. "Now stop being so scared and come on."

Navi jumped down off the counter, scampering to catch up to her. "Well, okay... I don't like this."

Midna laughed. "Of course you don't like this; you're Navi."

"It's not like I'm afraid of everything! You're just too brave for your own good."

"Okay, fair. But welcome-" She jumped up onto the door handle, pulling in the lock mechanism and letting it swing open. "-To the walk in."

Midna could remember what it looked like to her the first time going into the walk in: shelves upon shelves of food. She had never seen that much food in her life, before working at Guard. And this? This wasn't just her fantasy; it was every rat's fantasy.

"Whoa." Navi's eyes were wide, jaw dropped. "And you go here all the time? The whole colony could-"

"Secret." Midna demanded, jumping down from the handle. "I'm just sharing a little bit with you now, so no one will notice. But if the whole colony knew..."

"They would do something about it, wouldn't they? The people here?"

She nodded. "But for now... Come on in."

Food after food, thing after thing they tried, and Navi couldn't really distinguish between any of them. She could taste it, but the difference between a tomato and a tomatillo, or a young cheddar versus an aged white cheddar, or anything like that was lost on her. Midna was left with the same disappointment she had back at the old ladies house, trying the grapes and cheese there.

"Yeah, I don't get it." Navi admitted, swallowing a chunk of blue cheese. "It's cool you know things like this, though... But it's really getting late, we should head back to the colony."

"I mean..." Midna pushed the walk in door shut, all the way until she heard it click. "It wouldn't be any harm to visit."

"Great! Let's go."

This time it was her turn to hesitantly follow Navi on their way out of the restaurant, down dark alleyways and creepy gutters. Midna kept on her back paws, just to stay a little cleaner, nose wrinkled at all of the offensive smells. She definitely hadn't missed any of this; scrounging through garbage for a half decent meal was not her idea of fun by any means. But, really, at the same time...  
She missed the colony. It was a little lonely just being surrounded by humans, as nice as Link was, and as amusing as it all was sometimes. Navi could get annoying, and Fi could get repetitive, and Tatl was stubborn, but... They were like weird siblings. Without them...

"Here we are!" Navi declared, gesturing to a decrepit boat tied to the edge of the pier, mostly covered by a disgusting tarp. "It's not quite as nice as the basement, but it's our new home."

"So surrounded by water?"

"What, are you afraid of water?" Navi grinned. 

"No, it's just..." She shrugged. "Strange for rats."

"Yeah, and so is your restau-"

"Shh!" Midna clapped her paw over Navi's mouth. "I'm serious!"

"Sorry!" She squeaked, pulling the paw away. "Okay. Secret. You know I hate your secrets, right?"

"Yep."

"And I think it's a bad idea?"

"Yep."

"Are you listening to me?"

"Nope."

Navi groaned. "Okay, fine, come on. Everyone will want to know you're okay."

She hopped out, running across the rope, and jumped into the boat. Midna swallowed, thinking about the fact she'd have to walk on all fours to get across there... It was fine. She was a rat, after all. Taking a deep breath, she ran out across the roof and jumped in after her.

The commotion was immediate. Rats swarmed her for hugs, asking where she'd been, asking how she survived the trip, wanting to know everything that happened to her so far. Vague answers would only last so long, though...

Other rats got pushed aside, and Zant approached, trying to hide the disappointment on his face. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Oh, yeah, like you actually missed me." She muttered, rolling her eyes. "Enjoying leading the colony?"

"It's not like that..."

"It's so like that."

"It really isn't." He argued, a little edge in his voice.

"It's probably like that." Fi chimed in. "Considering that he-"

"Shut up, Fi." Zant barked, pulling away from the hug. "I am glad you're okay."

"Yeah, me too."

"And we needed an excuse for a party." He added. "So..."

Midna scoffed. "You never need an excuse for a party. You'd throw one even if I had died-"

"Well then! Let's play some music!"

It didn't take long for the musicians to start, breaking out a tune for rats to dance across the floor too. The curved boat bottom didn't make it easy, but no one could have noticed, watching them go. Midna enjoyed dancing, but... Something was holding her back.

"Come on, join us already!" Tatl demanded, grabbing her paws. "You're back after all, aren't you?"

Was she? And as Tatl danced away, she wasn't sure. Living here certainly wasn't a possibility; she had the little bed Link made her back at his apartment. So...

Midna walked over to where Zant was and cleared her throat. "Well, Zant, this was a fun visit, and you got to have your party-"

"Yeah, it's good to have you- visit?" He blinked. "What do you-?"

"I have other things I'm doing." She laughed, trying to pretend that this was normal, lighthearted. "You couldn't think I was going to stick with the colony forever, right?"

"Is this because I took over?"

"No, Zant, it's-"

"No, it's fine, it's fine." He said in a clear, calm voice. "Where are you staying?"

"Old apartment building." Technically not a lie...

"And what will you eat? Since you're so picky."

"There's a dumpster outside a nearby restaurant." She answered quickly, growing impatient. "I'm fine on my own. I thought you've been trying to get me to leave all this time, so why are you fighting it now!?"

Everyone fell silent.

"I wasn't-"

"No, Zant, it's fine." It hurt to turn away like this, but right now Midna couldn't care less. "Goodbye. I'll visit, once in a while."

And with that she hopped out of the boat, ran across the rope, and started away into the night. 

***

Link's apartment building had to be around here somewhere; she could recognize it easily. But right now it was a matter of finding it. Her eyes weren't focusing on the buildings like they should have, her heart was heavy in her chest. She was a rat, she belonged with the colony, but she was also a chef. She belonged with her kitchen, at Guard. 

And she forgot just how two-faced and awful Zant was. Who he was completely changed depending on who was watching.

But even once she was safe and secure in her own little bed, ready to fall asleep, she couldn't help the feeling that she left her true home behind her.


	6. Link

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are getting smoother in the kitchen, and Link is really just taking a step back... Except when it comes to Revali.
> 
> But Mr. Hyrule seems to be up to something that won't slip his attention, either.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dinner is served!

As time went on, Link started to realize that he truly knew nothing. In the kitchen he was totally lost, relying completely on Midna to make sure he didn't completely mess something up... Like the soup that first day. Sometimes he swore that he still couldn't get that awful taste out of his mouth.   
But they were a long way from that nasty soup. Midna was an amazing chef, and controlling him like she was, well... They had really gotten places. Revali rarely yelled at him, now. It was nice.

"I need someone to cover scallops!" Zelda shouted, shaking the pan one more time before moving to whatever she needed to do.

"Got it!" Revali yelled at the same time he raised his hand with a thumbs up.

They both looked at each other and blushed.

"You go." Revali offered.

"No, go ahead."

"Someone better go, before the scallops burn!" Urbosa yelled back.

Revali stepped forward, grabbing the pan and taking charge of Zelda's station. Link went back to his own, roasting the vegetables. But, while he was at it...  
The vegetables went into the oven and Link, not Midna, stepped over to Revali's station. She seemed to get the idea, washing her hands and starting to fix up the fish he was working on. Link recognized a little of what she was doing: scaling and skinning the fish, saving the head and tail for their stocks, keeping his elbows in, but... The rest lost him. Entirely. It was starting to freak him out just a little bit. Not too bad, but...

Zelda had come back to her station, meaning Revali was back to his.

"Did you... Cover my station?" He asked, as if he didn't already know. 

Midna made Link nod.

"Well, let's just hope we don't run out of the roast vegetables for dinner tonight." Revali said, turning his face away a little to cover how he was blushing. "We wouldn't want that now, would we?"

"No sir."

He snorted. "Sir?"

Link shrugged. "You are always bossing me around."

"It's my job to boss you around." He pointed out with a smile. "And I'm bossy, it's part of who I am."

"Well alright then, boss."

Zelda rolled her eyes. "Back to work, you two. Flirt in your own time."

"That wasn't flirting!" Revali added very quickly. "If it was flirting, it would be obvious."

She laughed, shaking her head as she went back to her station.

"Would it?" Link asked. 

Revali turned bright red. "Yep. Very obvious. Back to work."

***

"Orders are slowing down, huh?" Revali asked Zelda as she walked by.

She nodded. "You and Link, take ten. I should be able to handle things without you for a bit."

Link nodded, turning towards the door for some fresh air. That's where Midna was leading him too, but he glanced over his shoulder to sign to Revali. 

"You coming?"

He nodded. "I'll be out in a second; my hands reek of fish."

Link couldn't argue with that, so he let Midna do the leading and stepped outside. Not even really a minute after, Revali stepped out too.

"Oh, that's a relief." Revali said, shutting the door behind him and leaning against it.

"What?"

"When you stepped out, I was afraid you would be smoking. I can't stand that." He explained. "I grew up in a small town, far away from the big cities. The air was clear and clean, not the awful smoky haze like it seems to be so often here."

Link nodded. "I grew up here my whole life, so..."

"Have you ever gotten out of Paris?"

He shook his head.

"You have to." Revali declared with a firm nod. "It really is amazing, to step out where it's not crowded like this... Of course, not many opportunities for a chef in a tiny town like I came from."

"Not many good opportunities, probably."

He snorted. "You can say that again... I need to step back in, but... You have a couple more minutes still, just don't be late."

Revali disappeared inside, and Link let out a sigh. Why was it so hard to talk to him? One minute he was open, talking about his home, the next he was just reminding him of the time. It was-

Midna shifted, pushing on the edge of his toque. That's why she was in a hurry to get out; it had to be hot in there. Link took her out, setting her down on top of the, closed, dumpster. 

"You need a moment to stretch?"

She nodded, then scampered off. Weird. He supposed, though, for having a little rat chef controlling his every move, he really wasn't one to talk about weird. Link set his toque back on top of his head, then-

Immediately it was yanked off. Mr. Hyrule was standing in the doorway, closing the door behind him, holding his toque. Link raised his eyebrows, about to sign something, when-

"You were putting it on wrong." He explained. "Place it on your head like this, not that far back. See, there you are."

Mr. Hyrule nodded, then turned and went back inside.

Strange...

But Midna was running back, so Link scooped her up, put her on his head, re-placed his toque in the correct position, and went back inside.

Truthfully, it felt like it was in the same place, but he guessed he would never know.

***

"Last order is out!" Zelda declared as soon as the doors to the restaurant swung closed behind the waiter. "Good work everyone."

Link signed for applause, and Revali laughed.

"I can get your station." Link offered. "Since we already kind of share one."

"Yeah, there really wasn't room for another chef in this kitchen." Revali elbowed him a little. "But that's fine, I clean up after myself. I'm not that much of a slob."

"Oh really?" Link grinned.

He crossed his arms. "You're the guy who let dirty dishes pile up so high on your station-"

"I was new!"

"-that it nearly reached the ceiling. Being new is no excuse for being a slob. I wasn't a slob when I was new."

Link stuck out his tongue at him about to sign to him when Mr. Hyrule's heavy hand landed on his shoulder. "Actually, you may all go home, leave your stations."

Just the feeling made his skin crawl, his whole body rejecting the touch. It was awful, he hated it-

Revali looked at Link, then at Mr. Hyrule, shrugged, then turned to leave.

He didn't miss him signing "Good luck" at him from the door, though. Everyone left, making it just Link and Mr. Hyrule.

"Can I step out for a minute?" Link asked, holding his breath. "I have something... stabbing me in my shoe."

Mr. Hyrule sighed, raising his hand. "Quickly."

Link stepped out, glanced behind him to make sure Mr. Hyrule wasn't watching, then let Midna go. 

"Head back to the apartment, okay?" He told her, briefly rubbed his shoulder, then turned back to the door, going back inside.

"Did you get it?"

Link frowned. "Get what?"

"Whatever was in your shoe?"

He nodded. "Yep, got it."

That was almost bad. Damn it, he needed to be smarter. And Mr. Hyrule kept trying to look him in the eye...

"Come back to my office." Mr. Hyrule beckoned for him to follow, striding slowly towards the door.

Link's mind was working a million miles an hour as he followed with short, reluctant steps. Was he in trouble? What was going on? Was it about the toque? Was he finally getting a better fitting uniform? Did he know about Midna? 

Mr. Hyrule sat himself down in one chair, gesturing for Link to sit in the other. "You've been doing very well, Link. I'm impressed."

"Thank you." He signed, sitting down at the very edge of the chair. 

"How are you doing, so far? Enjoying yourself?" He reached for a bottle of wine, pouring a couple glasses and handing one to Link.

He nodded. "It's been amazing."

"Is Revali a good teacher?"

Again he nodded, more vigorously this time. "He's been the best, I love working with him."

"Good." Mr. Hyrule smiled. "A toast- to your success."

Link smiled awkwardly, clinking their glasses together before taking a drink. It was good wine; well, he didn't know wine, but it tasted good at least.

Even if he didn't, he might pretend it did to satisfy Mr. Hyrule.

"So... Why did you bring me here?"

Mr. Hyrule shrugged. "I wanted to see how you're doing; to make sure my prodigy isn't being held back."

"I wouldn't call myself a pro-"

"You have no training?"

Other than Midna training him, no, so Link shook his head.

"Then you are a prodigy."

He shrugged; accepting that he was would be lying, so instead he just drank more wine. "This is really good. What is it?"

Mr. Hyrule just smiled. "A good kind. Go ahead, have some more. It's on me, tonight."

So, with a nervous feeling he couldn't quite place, Link drank.

***

Link could have said how much time had gone by since he started drinking, only that it had been a while... And a few glasses. He wasn't drunk, though, definitely not...

Okay, that was a lie. He was most certainly, without a doubt, wasted. Not so bad he was doing crazy things, like the time he accidentally broke a lady's antique vase, but it wasn't exactly a level of intoxication ideal for talking to one's boss.

"But how familiar are you with rats?"

"Rats?" Link's hands were clumsy as he signed. "Don't really know much about them... Why?"

"Have you ever kept one?" Mr. Hyrule asked, leaning forward in his chair and attempting eye contact. "As a pet, perhaps?"

He immediately looked away, twisting his free lock of hair in the front. "Nope. Never really had any pets, unless you count the goldfish I got as a prize from my elementary school."

"I don't."

"It's name was Glory." Link continued, sipping at more wine. "But it died after a few weeks."

"I don't want to hear about-"

"Oh!" He suddenly remembered, sitting straight up in his chair. "I kept chickens for a while, with my mom."

Mr. Hyrule cleared his throat. "That's nice, but-"

"We had a few different kinds, but they were all hens. One was a Rhode Island Red, but she was old and tired all the time. The there were a few Orpingtons, but my favorite was the Australorps. Do you wanna know why?"

He sighed. "Why?"

"Their feathers are beautiful... We had some that were the black variety, and they were stunning. The blue sheen on their feathers was like... Like..." Link frowned in concentration, finding it difficult to compare his chickens to anything around... Then he got it. "Revali!"

"What?"

"The sheen on the feathers is almost the color of Revali's hair, and... Yeah... He's so pretty."

Mr. Hyrule looked perplexed. "Who?"

"Revali." He answered, the most obvious thing he could have ever said. "He's so beautiful and skilled and he's such an ass-"

"Alright, I think I get the-"

Link started giggling, holding out his glass for some more wine. "His name sounds like Ravioli."

"Okay. That's all I need to hear about Revali, alright?" Mr. Hyrule refilled the glass. "But have you ever worked in close proximity to rats?"

"Nope."

"Not even at a... Pet store?"

"Nah, never got hired at any of those." Link answered, shrugging.

Mr. Hyrule frowned. "Have you lived with any rats?"

"Not that I know of."

"Alright, that's quite enough of this... To what do you owe your great success on the kitchen?"

"Uhhh..." Link kept fiddling with his hair. "You're supposed to answer family to those questions, aren't you?"

Mr. Hyrule pressed his eyes shut. "Yes, I suppose that is a fine answer."

"Do I pass?"

"Pass what?" 

Link frowned, taking another swing of wine. "This seemed like a test."

"Yes. Indeed it was." Mr. Hyrule sighed. "A test of my patience."

"What?"

"Nothing at all." He stood, setting down the wine bottle on the desk. "It was good talking to you, Link."

"Good talking to you too?"

"Now, will you do me a favor?"

Link stood up as well, finishing his glass. He swayed a little bit, but kept his balance. "What?"

"Clean up the kitchen, will you? Thank you, Link." Mr. Hyrule smiled, grabbed his keys and his coat, and left the office.

Stumbling a little bit over his own shoes, Link followed him to the door. Cleaning up the kitchen couldn't be too... Bad.

He forgot that Mr. Hyrule had sent the other chefs home without cleaning up their stations, which meant... Looking at the mess sobered him up for a moment, walking over to grab a rag. He tried to walk over to start wiping things down, but his eyes felt so heavy...

Link's head started nodding down, body sinking slowly to the ground. 

He could clean up later, right?

Before he knew it he had fallen fast asleep on the kitchen floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I know nothing about keeping chickens, if I messed up something badly tell me very gently please...


	7. Midna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Midna wakes up in the apartment alone, and has to go search for Link... But the real question is, what's wrong with Rhoam?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the later chapter, I've had a migraine all day and I'm not having it.

When Midna had gotten back to the apartment last night, Link wasn't there yet. It made sense; he did tell her to go without him... And earlier in the day Rhoam had snatched his toque off. They were lucky she had to stretch her legs, because otherwise he would be in huge trouble.

Did that mean Rhoam was onto something? Did he suspect... No, he couldn't. Could he?

What was going on at the restaurant? Why did he want to talk to Link? There were so many questions, all of them unanswered, and it was driving Midna crazy. Secrets were fine, as long as they weren't being kept from her...

But, regardless of where Link was, she needed sleep. It was a demanding job, that was for certain, and if they were going to be at the restaurant to start the prep work in the morning, she would need to get some rest.

As she climbed into her bed though, all she could think of was the colony. She was surprised by how much she missed all of them, and without Link here...

She felt alone. She felt very, very alone.

***

The next morning Midna was up early, much earlier than they would wake up normally for work, but the sun was out, and and was hungry.

And... Link wasn't there. 

Immediately she was struck with panic, searching the apartment, making sure he didn't go missing, who knows what happened last night... Who was the last person he was seen with?

Mr. Rhoam Hyrule.

Midna rushed to the window, climbing down the fire escape like she always did to get out on her own. It took a while to get down to the ground, having to be careful of where she jumped and landed and held onto, but it did the job. She was confident in herself, despite the wind... And that wasn't exactly what she was thinking of right now. Right now, she needed to go save Link.

But when she got down to the streets it was busier than normal, the crush of traffic on their way to morning jobs and obligations. Midna had to be very careful, keeping to the shadows, avoiding anyone who she thought might panic upon seeing a her. Erring on the side of caution was always the way to go as a rat, but...

She didn't have time for caution.

Throwing all sneakiness aside, Midna dashed to the restaurant as quickly as she could. What would one or two people who were afraid do? She was going too fast for them to catch her. This was possibly a rescue operation, and she had to get to-

The restaurant.

Everything with it looked normal. The lights were out, the door shut and most likely locked, the window open as it always was. Jumping up on the dumpster to get to the ledge, she cautiously let herself in.

But everything was not as it should have been inside the restaurant.

Pots and pans were in the dishwashers sink, sauté pans still sat on the stove where they were left, and counters were dirty. There was even still food out on a couple of the stations, disgustingly enough. Apparently, after everyone was told to leave without cleaning up, no one else decided to, either.

That was strange. Link was messy, but he knew better than to leave a mess; Revali would be disappointed in him.

Of course, it was all about Revali these days. Talking during work, laughing together on breaks, teasing constantly: it was cute, but it got a little annoying once in a while, since she controlled Link's body. Sometimes she just wanted to make him step forward and make a move already. In the beginning she hadn't pegged Revali for being a coward, but... Apparently he wasn't as brave as she thought. At least, not when it comes to romance. 

But right now it wasn't Revali and Link she needed to be thinking about, it was just Link. Namely, finding him. Flicking on the light switch with her tail, Midna got to work looking around. First she glanced into Rhoam's office, since she was most afraid he would be in there, then she peered into the walk in. That's where she would hide someone if she had to, anyway...

But, thankfully, there was no one in there. Just the normal assortment of food, which reminded her even more of the colony. She missed Navi, even if she was a little annoying at times, and she couldn't understand food for the life of her. And Fi would love this; it was so well organized. And Tatl and Tael would completely disappear in the shelves, chasing each other...

Link. She needed to find Link. Why was she so scatterbrained today? This was ridiculous.

Since she already checked those rooms, next was just the general area of the kitchen. If she had to search the restaurant that would be... Difficult. But to find Link-

Never mind. There he was.

Link was sprawled out, absolutely dead asleep on the floor at the saucier's station. He was definitely breathing, his quiet snores only audible once she had gotten this close, his chest rising and falling. 

Asleep. Not dead. Midna breathed a sigh of relief, then started trying to wake him up.

Jumping up on his leg, she scurried up to his face, patting his cheek a couple times with her paws. 

No response. Instead of paws, she tried whipping him in the face with her tail. She tried it again and again, until there was a red mark across his cheek. 

So, obviously that wasn't about to work. She tried everything: jumping on him, dropping things on him from the counter, slapping him, chattering in his ear, pulling open his eyes... No response whatsoever. He just turned his head and kept snoring.

But there was one more thing...

With some difficulty, Midna jumped up onto his head, grabbed his hair, and pulled with all her strength.

Link lurched up, standing, holding both arms in the air. Perfect, but... He was still snoring. Not nearly as perfect. Clearly, though, she could control him whether or not he was awake.

Weird, but... Doable.

Putting his toque on to conceal her, Midna got to work. She cleared all of the food waste off the counter first, immediately reminded of how Zant would yell at her for wasting 'food'. Irritating. Then she dumped all the pots and pans into the sink, ran some new soapy water, and got to work. She wiped down all the countertops, washed all the dishes, then-

A motorcycle just pulled up outside. Revali.

"Wake up, wake up, wake up wake up..." Midna pulled on Link's hair again, harder, trying to wake him up to no avail. "I swear you would sleep for years if you didn't have an alarm, wake up!"

Link didn't respond.

His eyes were closed. It was obvious he was asleep, so, so...

Sunglasses. There were a pair of sunglasses on a shelf by the door. Midna couldn't remember who they belonged to, but she did know it would cover Link's, very closed, eyes. She walked him over, put them on, then went right back to drying dishes.   
She had just finished with that, moving on to prep work when Revali actually walked in.

"Ah, so I see you're here early too." Revali took off his leather jacket, hanging it up on a peg and switching into his chef's coat. "How did the chat with Rhoam go?"

Midna lifted his hand, able to execute an approximation of the so-so movement. 

"That's fair, he is a hard ass, after all. I swear he doesn't even like food sometimes, and he certainly doesn't like any of his employees." He shrugged. "But he seems to like you alright, most of the time. You didn't get in trouble?"

Midna had no idea, but she shook his head. "No."

"That's good, I want you to stick around." Revali paused with what he was chopping. "I mean, not like I'm fond of you or anything."

It was so, so painful to just keep Link looking at him with a blank stare, unable to really sign anything without making it clear that something wasn't right with his motor skills.

Revali laughed. "Don't look at me like that, you had to have known I didn't hate you. I don't just mentor any lame chef who comes in here without a clue about how to work in a kitchen."

Midna was trying to think of what she could say, but Revali beat her to the punch.

"What's with the sunglasses?" He reached forward to take them off, but Link blocked his hand. "Alright, leave them on. Migraine?"

She shook his head, then pointed up at the light. 

"Ahh, just light sensitivity?"

He nodded. That one didn't feel like as much of a lie since, come to think of it, Link did wear sunglasses around the apartment sometimes when he was feeling a little overstimulated. The fact these weren't his glasses did make that more difficult to explain, but... Maybe the episode came on suddenly?

"That's alright. Are you feeling okay, though?"

He nodded again.

"You can hide in the walk in if you aren't, the cold is kind of nice."

Once more, a nod.

Revali turned, looking straight at him again. "What did you and Rhoam talk about?"

He shrugged.

"What, you can't tell me?"

Midna bit her tongue, hoping Link would forgive her when she shook his head. There was nothing else she could do.

Revali's expression turned icy. "What, are you having secret, special talks with the boss now?"

She did nothing.

"I see how it is." He scraped up the vegetables he was chopping, practically throwing them into the pot. "You start out here as a dish washer, as a garbage boy, then you amaze us all with your 'talent,' get someone else to teach you how it all works, use them-" He swallowed. "-To get acquainted with the restaurant, then get in good with the boss. I'll bet I don't even matter to you anymore, do I?"

Midna was forced to watch, wide eyed, as he began to blink away tears.

"You know what? I'm sick and tired of this. I'm done with you. Some of us start here as fourteen-year-old foster system rejects of society, washing dishes, and force ourselves to learn and adapt so we can make enough money to survive. And you waltz in, completing the whole job in days?" Revali shook his head. "And what do you have to say?"

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

"I... I liked you a lot. If I didn't, I wouldn't have trained you do well, but now?" He kept blinking the tears out of his eyes, but one fell down his cheek.

Link snored. 

And Revali slapped him right across the face, sending Link falling to the ground. Midna grabbed his hair and clung to the edge of his toque, trying to keep herself hidden.

"No. I'm calling in sick today; I've had it with you." He wiped his eye, dropped his knife on the counter, and stormed out of the kitchen.

Link was up in an instant, and not because Midna was pulling his hair. He was signing something, chasing him out of the kitchen, throwing himself in front of Revali's bike so he couldn't leave.

Midna could see Link's reflection in the chrome of the bike. "Revali, wait!"

"Wait for what?" Revali practically spat. "For you to get everything you want from me and leave me in the dust? Not about to happen."

"It's not like that, I-"

"Not like what? Not like what I just saw in there?" He laughed, mirthless and cold. "Really now?"

"Revali, I..." He swallowed. "I'm not good with words-"

"You can say that again."

Link winced. "And sometimes I really don't know what to say, or what would be okay to say or not because... I'm not trying to surpass you as a chef. I'm not even a good chef!"

"False modesty is disgusting." Revali stated, completely deadpan. "Try another manipulation tactic."

"The truth is, I..." Link was reaching up for his toque, but Midna forced his hands back down. "I'm not really the good chef."

"Really? Well then, who is?"

"It's..." He kept trying to reach for the hat, but she wouldn't let him. "I don't... This is going to sound crazy."

"No crazier than you've been sounding already, strange man I don't care about standing in front of my motorcycle."

"No, I... There's..." 

Link tried to reach up one last time, and Midna tried to force his hands down, but instead he took a step forward. He hit the front of the bike mostly, but with the angle Revali's head was at...

They kissed. It wasn't smooth, or pretty, since it was more of a colliding of faces than a kiss at first, but that's what happened. And strangely enough, they both leaned into it. It was tender and sweet, as if Link was trying to apologize.

They both pulled away, breathless.

"So you do feel the same." Revali smiled to himself, looking down, then quickly drew himself back up. "Of course you do, I knew it from the start. Definitely. And we have a restaurant to open, don't we?"

Midna couldn't see Link smile, but she bet he did as he nodded. They both went right back inside, beginning to prep once more. 

"So now can you tell me what you and Rhoam talked about?"

Link shrugged. "Honestly, I don't know. He asked me a few questions about working here, and kind of got me drunk?"

That explained being conked out before cleaning the kitchen. Midna rolled her eyes.

"He got you drunk." Revali blinked. "Rhoam. Our boss."

He nodded. "It was weird."

"No kidding. I'm guessing that's why you wouldn't tell me earlier?"

Link shrugged again. "I guess."

"Then that's... Understandable. And back to work, both of us."

Midna took over, prepping and cooking in the familiar rhythm the restaurant had fallen into for her. It was good. This all seemed good.

***

And at the end of the night...

"Come on, I'll give you a ride home." Revali offered, tossing on his leather jacket. "Ever ridden on a motorcycle before?"

Link shook his head.

"Well then, finish up whatever you have and meet me out back, okay?" 

He nodded, watching Revali's every move as he stepped out. Everyone else had left, so... Link took off his toque, holding out his hand for Midna to climb into. She did, and he set her down on the counter. 

"Can you get back without me?"

She should have seen that coming. Another lonely night, where he probably wouldn't come home until late... Or he wouldn't come home at all.

She nodded.

Link smiled. "Alright, thanks Midna."

And with that he was out the door, and the sound of a motorcycle zipping away soon followed.

Midna started toward the window, ready to make her way back to the apartment, when it hit her: she didn't need to be alone. She had family, right in town. A smile on her face, Midna hopped out the window and started toward the boat; she was going to go find Navi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big Revalink! Yay!


	8. Link

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After work, Revali whisks Link away on his motorcycle to go somewhere that's become home to him, and Link still just can't believe what's happening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Chicken Noodle Monday!

They didn't go straight home. Of course they didn't, since neither of them had dinner yet and Revali was driving, but Link still couldn't believe it when they pulled up to a nice little café a little way downtown.

"They stay open later than we do, since they're so close to the airport. You have to try the potato soup, it's simply divine."

Link snickered. "Simply divine?"

"What? It is."

He shrugged. "Everything just sounds so much more grand when you say it."

Revali nodded slowly. "I'll take that as a compliment. Alright then, let's go."

As they walked in, Link could see why Revali would like this place. If was quaint, but polished, with a warm, friendly air. All of the decor matched, but not in a pretentious way. As soon as he walked in, a short waitress with white hair waved at him and came over.

"Hello, Revali, how's it going?" She asked with a warm smile. "A- And who's this?"

"This is Link, my..." They looked at each other, not quite meeting eyes when Revali spoke. "Boyfriend?"

Link nodded, feeling warmth bloom in his chest. Right now he was soaring a million miles in the air. He needed to pinch himself; this was too good to be true.

Also a little quick, but after this long of working together, and wanting to be with him, a little quick was welcome.

"So, I can- can I get anything for you to drink?" The waitress asked; Link noticed her name tag read Paya.

"Chamomile tea, please?" Revalj asked without so much as glancing at the menu.

"And for you?"

"The same, please." Link asked, desperately hoping she understood sign. 

She nodded. "Alright, I'll be right back with that. Do you need another minute for food, or are you just getting something to drink today?"

"Should we just get two different things, and share?" Revali asked just above a whisper, leaning over the table a little bit.

Link blushed as he nodded, picking up a menu.

"Well then, I'll get the potato soup..."

"As always." Paya smiled. "And you?"

"The chicken noodle soup?" 

She nodded. "A- Alright, I'll be right back with your tea in a couple minutes."

Paya walked away, leaving just he and Revali at the table. 

"So..." Link signed, trying to figure out where the hell you go from here.

"So..." Revali copied, smirking.

They both just awkwardly laughed. 

"Sorry, I've never done any of..." Link waved his hand in the air. "This."

"Really?"

"Nope. Never really dated before." He admitted, running his finger back and forth over the textured edge of the menu. "In case you haven't noticed, I'm kind of a loser."

Revali raised an eyebrow. "I don't think so."

"Really?"

"A dork, that's for certain." He added, nodding a little bit. "And weird. And a little confusing at times... But not a loser, really."

"Well, I'll have to add that to my resume." Link grinned. "Not a loser."

"If you ever have to apply anywhere else. Rhoam loves you."

"He does?"

"Oh yeah." Revali gave one single nod. "He hasn't threatened to fire you once... After the soup incident."

Link turned bright red. "Yeah..."

"What were you thinking with that, really?" He asked, leaning across the table again in that way that made Link's mind go completely blank. "Because that was truly stupid."

He chuckled a little, turning red for sure. "Do you want to know the truth?"

"More than anything."

"I knocked over the pot."

Revali's eyes went wide. "You didn't."

Link laughed harder now, both at himself and Revali's face. "I knocked it over and tried to cover it up."

"Urbosa said it was disgusting when she first tried it-"

"I just dumped whatever into it at first." He admitted, just keeping the ball rolling. "Then I realized what was wrong with it, and... Fixed it? I almost don't think I was thinking."

"You, Link Wilde, are ridiculous and amazing."

Link blushed.

"Also, speaking of names," Revali raised an eyebrow. "Any direct connection to Chef Wilde?"

He shook his head. "Not that I know of."

"And yet you end up at his restaurant?"

"I don't know. My mom just said that she knew Mr. Hyrule well enough I could get a job there."

"Mr. Hyrule?" Revali laughed. "We all just call him Rhoam."

"Maybe that's why he threatens to fire you." Link smirked. "I mean..."

He rolled his eyes. "I doubt it... I seriously can't get over the fact you share a name, though. It's such an odd coincidence."

"I'm actually Chef Wilde himself, reincarnate."

Revali laughed, lightly batting his arm across the table. "Don't be stupid."

"No, seriously. It is I."

He snorted, still laughing. "Okay, okay."

"No, I'm not related to him." Link admitted, settling back down. "I used to pretend he was my dad though, when I was a kid. I grew up with a single mom, no clue who my dad even was."

"Wilde was just the family name, then?"

He shook his head. "My mom just chose it for me, I think. She liked the name."

"That's cool." Revali chuckled. "Link Wilde is such a grandiose name, too."

"Says Revali Gale."

"Fair enough, you got me there." He admitted, raising his hands in mock surrender. "We both have really extravagant names."

"I mean, I think Revali Gale is a little more dramatic than Link Wilde."

"That's a matter of opinion, and I say yours is wrong." Revali stated with a grin. "So..."

"So... Is Revali a family name?"

He shook his head, eyebrows pinching together. "No idea. I suppose it must be, as I can't figure out anything about it."

"It always makes me hungry." Link admitted with a shrug.

Revali snorted a laugh. "What?"

"You know... Ravioli?"

"...Ravioli?" He blinked. "Coming from you, Link?"

"I actually used to tell it to people like that." Link admitted. "Link of sausage?"

"You-" Revali laughed, covering his mouth, shaking his head. "You are truly ridiculous, you know that?"

He nodded, just as Paya came back around with two steaming mugs of tea.

"Ca- careful, they're hot." She set them each down in their little coasters, careful not to spill a drop. "Anything else I can get you?"

They both shook their heads. "No, I think we're good."

"Good! Then I'll be coming back out w-with your soup shortly." She smiled, then headed back over to another table.

"I love this spot." Revali breathed, taking a tentative sip of his tea. "After a day at work, it feels like home. I don't know if that's just me being crazy, but-"

"No." Link shook his head then put a spoonful of sugar in his tea. "You seem like you belong here, if that isn't weird to say."

"No, that's... pretty weird." 

He turned bright red. "Sorry, I-"

"But I don't think I mind." Revali shrugged, taking another sip. "I dyed my hair to match this place, you know? Life is about taking parts of home with you, and making yourself better with them."

Link cracked a smile. "Your hair has always reminded me of my chickens."

"It... What?" He squinted, eyebrows drawing up, mouth hanging open, looking more perplexed than Link had ever seen him. "How?"

"No! In a good way!"

"Well, I'd better hope so." Revali chuckled, taking another sip. "So go ahead: explain my chicken hair."

Link was sure that his face was positively scarlet. "Well, when I was younger, my mom and I raised chickens." 

He nodded. "That makes sense with your character."

"What does that mean?"

"Every time you have to break down a chicken, you freak out." Revali explained, absently stirring his tea with his spoon. "It's not a big thing, but I can tell you don't like it."

"Well..." Link left off the part where only Midna could force his body to break down a chicken like that. "Yeah, that's fair. It's not like I don't eat chicken, or anything like that, but... Anyway, hair."

He nodded. "Hair."

"So we kept a kind of chicken called- the breed doesn't matter to you, does it?"

"I wouldn't understand what it signifies, anyway."

Link nodded. "So, some of our chickens were black, but the sheen on their feathers was a really pretty shade of blue."

"Like my hair?" Revali asked, taking a sip of tea.

"Like your hair." He confirmed. "It's a really nice color, I love it."

Blushing, he swept his braid behind his shoulder. "Of course you do, it's gorgeous."

He really was.

"I do have a question though," Link asked, stirring his tea then taking a sip; still not quite sweet enough. "Is there something special about the bright green hair ties?"

"It's like I said," He shrugged. "Home."

Paya swept in with two hot bowl of soup, which she placed with shaky hands before rushing back off to the back.

"Just like home for you, I'm guessing, is chicken noodle soup." Revali added, drawing circles in the potato soup with his spoon. "I'm right?"

Link nodded. "I mean... Isn't it home for everyone?"

"...I guess you're right. Fuck, here we are, a couple of chefs on a date, and all we can talk about is food."

"And hair."

"And hair," Revali conceded. "Oh, and don't forget the chickens." 

Link laughed. "Of course not; can't forget them."

"Did they have names?" 

"They did, but-" He paused, pulling on one of his sideburns. "Are you sure you want to start that conversation?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Because I'm was a little bit of a crazy chicken man who doesn't know when to stop talking."

Revali shrugged. "Try me."

"Okay, so first there was Epona, and she was a..."

***

"The kitchen really is a disaster for you, isn't it?" Revali asked, seeming to be thinking out loud. "Since even Zelda has a hard time with the counter heights and you're, well..."

"Short?"

"Yeah." He agreed, taking a spoonful of the chicken noodle. "Very, very short."

"I mean, you aren't very tall either."

"Yes, but my height begins with a five."

Link pouted. "...fair enough."

"You really are extraordinarily short." Revali restated, grinning practically from ear to ear. "We're going to have to get you a chef's coat that fits properly, one of these days."

He nodded. "It's kind of bad."

"Yeah... It is certainly tight."

Link smirked. "Oh, and of course you've noticed that my uniform is tight."

Revali blushed. "I didn't mean it like-"

"I'm guessing you've noticed how tight the pants are, too?"

"...actually, no."

Link's eyes widened, mouth full of soup. "Really?"

"I would have to crane my neck to see that far down, and the chef's coat is so long you could wear it with no pants and still be decent."

He nearly spat. "Are you-"

Revali cackled. "Your face! That was priceless!"

His laugh was incredible. Not held back, not quieted, just a full on, head tipped back, snorting noises and all, laugh. Fuck, Link was done for. It was like his whole heart seized up in his chest, and-

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

Link took a deep breath. "Because you're beautiful," seemed like too cliché an answer, but that was pretty true. And "Because I'm still trying to convince myself this is really happening right now," felt the dumb, but-

His hands tried to put something together, but it didn't really happen. Instead, he retreated to fiddling with his hair.

Revali smiled, flipping his braids back over his shoulder. "I mean, I do know that I am quite beautiful-"

"You really are."

He blushed, caught off guard. "I mean I- of course. Yes. Uh huh."

Revali nodded, and Link laughed.

"You're adorable when you're embarrassed."

"Flattery will get you nowhere, you know." He pointed out, quickly recovering his composure. "It'll only have me asking what you want from me."

Link raised an eyebrow. "What do you think I want from you?"

"Mm, well we already know you need me when it comes to cooking-"

"True." 

"-And without my good graces, you wouldn't have lasted a day in that kitchen. Rhoam would have eaten you alive."

"Whatever would I do without you?" Link grinned, batting his eyelashes. "I'd probably still be washing dishes."

"Well, right now, of course." Revali agreed, taking a spoonful of the potato soup. "There's no shame in starting somewhere; you simply have to rise to the top."

"Like you have."

He blushed again. "What did I say about the flattery? Anyway, I'm not head chef yet, so I wouldn't say I'm exactly at the top."

Link nodded, finishing up the last of the chicken noodle. "But you want to be?"

"Of course." Revali sat up straighter, the movement almost making Link laugh; it reminded him of a chicken puffing itself up. "Who doesn't want to be the best?"

"I think sometimes I'd be satisfied to stay in the background."

"With talents like yours?" He raised an eyebrow. "Though... I do suppose being a chef is a lot of being in the background. It can become a thankless task, to some."

"Is it to you?"

Revali frowned, moving the last bits of the potato soup around with his spoon. "No. Though... I can't see myself staying at Guard forever. Living in the shadow, the reputation of another chef, only cooking his recipes... As amazing as Chef Wilde was... I think you get it."

Link nodded. "You want to be a chef for you, not for him?"

"Exactly. Though I wouldn't mind a sous chef like you, either."

He laughed. "Are you serious? Even though I apparently can't cook without you?"

"Especially since you can't cook without me." Revali smirked, finishing up the last bite of soup. "That way I don't have to worry about being replaced."

"No one could replace you."

"Again with the flattery?" He asked, but he was smiling as he stood up from his seat. "It's getting late though, and we have work tomorrow."

Link stood up as well, drinking the last little bit of his tea; it had gotten cold. "Well... This was really nice."

"It was... Despite the rocky start there back at the restaurant."

Midna forcing him to step forward, the accidental kiss, everything flashed through Link's head. Yikes. He nodded though, wincing a little at that.

"Glad it got better than that?"

"Me too, now come on, let's get you back to your place."

So they drove there on Revali's motorcycle, Link holding him around the middle, their bodies pressed close together. It was dizzying, making Link nearly unable to think of anything else. 

But he dropped him off at his apartment building, kissing him on the cheek and walking him up to his room.

Link passed out on the couch as soon as he was inside, not even checking to make sure Midna had made it back alright.


	9. Midna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Midna and Navi find the walk-in fridge's door is locked, Midna has to look for the key in Rhoam's office... But instead she finds something that'll change Link's life forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late chapter, I was very ill today and it completely skipped my mind! But it's here now?

"Psst, Navi!" Midna was outside the boat, tossing little pebbles against the side, hoping she could hear her. "Navi!"

Someone woke up; she could hear the sound of feet scuttling on the inside of the boat, coming up to the front so she could see them.

"What is it?" Fi's sleepy head, distinctive with her white fur, popped up over the side of the boat. "I do not think we are in any danger, Midna... But it is good to see you."

"I know, I just-" She shook her head. "Can you wake up Navi for me?"

"Alright. I can do that." Fi ducked back down, and the air was still for a couple of seconds before Navi scrambled awake.

Funny. It always used to be Midna who was asleep, with Navi pestering her to get up, and to stop being so lazy. Interesting how the tides turn.

It was also late at night, not early in the day, so that was probably throwing it too. She was always more awake at nighttime than Navi was. That was probably why she naturally wanted to sleep all day.

Navi's disheveled, blue-gray head popped up not long after, though, her eyes bleary with sleep. "What is it, Midna? Wait, Midna!?"

"Shh!" She demanded, gesturing for her to come closer. "Do you want food or what?"

"Okay, you got me, let's go." Navi hopped up out of the boat, ran across the rope, and joined her on the other side. "So, are we going back to the restaurant?"

Midna nodded. "I thought you'd appreciate it, after..."

"After how you left the other day? Zant was pissed." 

"Zant can be pissed." She nearly spat, starting on their way to Guard. "I'll drop in when I feel like it, I'm part of the colony, but he can't control me all the time. Hell, he's not even our leader!"

"Midna?"

"Yeah?"

"We don't have a leader." Navi pointed out. "You guys just both tried, then everyone decided to be democratic with it."

"I know that, which means I'm still part of the colony as long as you consider me part of it."

"You have been really distant lately, though." She added, turning her face away. "And people have been wondering if you're going to help the colony at all..."

"I will." Midna assured her. "I mean, I'm getting you something to eat right now."

"You're not listening! I don't count!" Navi exclaimed, hairs raised. "They don't count me on these things, since we're so close..."

They were close? She supposed they were... In a weird way. Bizarre sisters, but not really? It was a little bit sad to think that she had been so distant with the closest rat she had in her life.

"Zant's trying to kick me out, then?"

"Not so much, actually." Navi shrugged. "There isn't really anyone who started it, but..."

"It's just talk?"

"Just talk." She confirmed with a nod. "You should be fine."

"Good. Here we are-" Midna hopped up to the ledge with the window, open as ever. "-let's get something to eat."

Inside, the restaurant was clear. Everything cleaned up and put away, no one left behind working late, because Link had already left with his lovebird. She rolled her eyes, hopping in onto the countertop.

"Hey, how did you even figure out this place, anyway?" Navi asked, following close behind her. "Did it just happen to be here and have an open window, or...?"

"Are you kidding?" She glanced back at her, only to see the confused look on her face. "This is Guard. The Guard. Famed restaurant of Chef Wilde?"

"Was he the one on the TV back in the old lady's house?"

She nodded. 

"Ohh... Then this is like, a big deal for you?"

"Uh, yeah! I mean, just being here, let alone getting to cook here..." Midna trailed off, sure the smile on her face was dumb but not caring a thing about it. "People like my cooking. People!"

"Wait wait wait!" Navi stopped, eyes squeezed shut. "You cook here!?"

Maybe she told her too much, but right now? She didn't care. "Yeah."

"How!?"

Midna giggled. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

"Yes! I would!" Navi scrambled to catch back up. "Hey, seriously, what are you doing? People are dangerous, and-"

"I have a friend who's a person. I make it look like he can cook, and I get to cook. It works great, we both get what we want, and I'm not in any danger. Okay?"

"Okay... But I still don't like it."

"It's fine!"

Navi frowned. "Remember when Tatl and Tael had a human friend?"

"That... was different."

"Just..." She sighed, shaking her head. "Be careful?"

"I will, I will." Midna smiled at her, then jumped up to get the walk in's door.

Locked. Huh, that was strange. 

She dropped back down to the floor. "Alright, we'll need to get the key from Rhoam's office."

"Rhoam?"

"He's the new head chef, since Chef Wilde's death." Midna explained, walking over and jumping up on the door handle. "His keys should be in here."

"You know, this is a lot of work for food..."

"It's good food, you know that." She argued. "Definitely worth it- got the door!"

The office door swung open, and they both padded inside. The room was crowded, only really a Rhoam-sized pathway leading to his desk. She heard his keys should be at his desk, so... Midna crossed the room, jumped up onto his chair and hopped up onto it. Nothing was really on top, just a couple bills and a note about a business manager meeting.

Business manager? What kind of...

...business?

The room wasn't really crowded at all; it was full of cardboard cutouts. Each was recognizable as Chef Wilde, but they were... Wrong. He had been drawn with farming clothes, other strange costume pieces. In each he was holding a sign advertising a different kind of food: egg rolls, hash browns, frozen burritos...

"Is that the same chef? Why is he so..."

Midna frowned. "Rhoam has been using his image to market these, hasn't he? I knew there was something off about him, but I didn't realize he would take advantage of a dead chef's image like this... And this is frozen food!?"

She could hear the way, on every program, Chef Wilde stressed finding fresh, local produce and using that in your recipes. So this?

Navi shrugged. "So?"

She turned to look at her, nose wrinkled, ears flattened. "Chef Wilde hated the need for corporate, awful, low-quality frozen food! This is just... He's spitting in the face of all the he stood for."

"...got it. You're very passionate about frozen food. We were in here for the keys?"

"Yeah, I'm just..." Midna could feel the anger coursing through his veins. "Yeah, keys."

Jumping down onto the handle of the drawer, she used her body to leverage it open. This is where his keys should be, she vaguely remembered him telling someone they were in here, so where were...

"What's this?" Midna pushing away an opened envelope to reveal Link's name, printed on a folder. "Hold on, I need to check this out."

"Should I just go?"

"No, here's the keys." She grabbed them from the bottom of the drawer and tossed them up. "Think you can get the door open?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Then close it when you're done... And don't leave anything obvious!"

"Okay, okay! Have fun in here with your... Creepy cutouts."

Midna rolled her eyes, hauling out the folder and pushing it up onto the desk. "Now, let's see..."

She flipped it open, and immediately dove in. The first papers on top were employment, so that wasn't sketchy. But why was his file here? Shouldn't it be with the other employees files? Interesting...

"What's this?" Midna asked herself, pushing the employment papers aside and uncovering a handwritten letter.

"Dear Rhoam,

"I hope this letter finds you in good health. My own has been failing for some time now, and I fear I don't have much longer here on this earth. However, before I go, there's some business I need to take care of with you.  
"Do you remember my son, Link? He's all grown up now, as strange as it is to believe. I was hoping that he would be able to get a job at your restaurant. Not necessarily a chef's job, or anything of that nature, but allowing Chef Wilde's son to work in his kitchen would be a great kindness.   
"As for his parentage... He does not yet know. As an old friend, if you would like to tell him you are welcome, but I didn't want to raise him to be full of himself. He's a hard worker, and doesn't need to skate by on who his parents are.

"I am sure you will take care of my boy, and thank you in advance.

"Sera." 

Midna's eyes widened. "Chef Wilde's son!? How..."

She pushed the letter on top of the other papers, uncovering the next document. It appeared to be some kind of... Report? Test? In large letters it declared "DNA Match" between...

Chef Wilde and Link. Again. He had it tested, and it was confirmed. 

Underneath that was Chef Wilde's will. It was long, and difficult to read, but when it reached near the end...

"Unless another heir is located before September 15th, 2019, I leave Guard and all of its handling to Rhoam Bosphoramus Hyrule."

September 15th? That was in... Midna glanced over at the calendar on his desk. Six days!? Pushing that paper over and flipping the file closed again, she picked it up firmly with her teeth. She needed to get this back to-

Rhoam pushed open the door, and Midna could imagine what he saw: a rat, on his desk, stealing his important documents. He yelled, grabbing something to hit her with. She clenched the folder in her teeth, and jumped off the desk. Fast as she could, she ran. Heart pounding. Adrenaline pumping. Jumping up to the counter, running across all the stations to the window.

Except the folder wouldn't fit easily through the window...

Something slammed down next to her, barely missing crushing her into the counter. Midna took a deep breath, squeezed her eyes shut, and jumped. The folder barely made it through as she rotated. Once outside, she crashed onto the lid of the dumpster. Her back would ache from that later, for sure, but right now she didn't have time. Righting herself, she held on tighter and kept on running.

She just hoped he hadn't found Navi in there.

"Get back here you-" Rhoam was clearly still following her, but she bet that she was faster. 

For a rat, she hadn't lived in Paris long. But it was long enough. Midna knew which alleyways she could take, what passages, which streets would lead her home. Try as he might, yelling the whole time, Rhoam just couldn't keep up. Regardless, she didn't stop running. The moment she did, she was sure someone would catch her. But right now the apartment building was in sight. 

Running up to the fire escape, Midna began the precarious flight up. This was difficult without holding a file full of papers, but right now... Running on pure adrenaline and a need to get this up, it felt like a breeze. Nothing swayed her. Each time, her paws found sure footing. She was at the top in no time.

Jumping through the window, and rotating to get the papers through, landed Midna on the floor of Link's kitchen, her tail stinging from the impact from hitting the ground for the second time.

But she was back. And Link was...

Asleep. Passed out on the couch, still in his clothes.

"Not again..." Midna jumped up on him, slapping him in the face with her tail. "Wake up!"

For a second, she wondered if he would wake up.

This time though, thankfully, he snapped awake, eyes wide and worried, nearly flinging Midna off his chest. "What's going on?"

She grabbed the file again, pushing it into his hands.

"But why would..." 

Link's face paled as he started to read, eyes getting wide as he started to realize what the papers were saying. He was holding his breath now, eyes sweeping back and forth over the page-

And, just like that, he fainted.

All of that important information, and he just... Well, she supposed that made sense. If she had found out who her parents were, she would be shocked too; and if she found out her parents were famous? That they were her role models?

Rats didn't really have people like that, but... Imagining that Chef Wilde had anything to do with her was a dizzying thought. She cooked with his son. Hell, she taught his son to cook. That was... A lot to process.

So, in reality, she couldn't really fault Link for passing out.

Midna sighed, shook her head, and went over to get some food from the kitchen. She never actually got anything to eat at the restaurant, and after catching her breath her stomach was growling like crazy. So she fixed up a quick but of leftovers, stuffed them in her face as quickly as possible, and wandered over to her bed.

Still. Link was Chef Wilde's son? She supposed they shared a last name, but he hadn't even known they were related until now, so... It was odd. This was all so odd.

But that's why Rhoam was acting so weird: because Link was the rightful owner of Guard, but he was keeping it secret past the deadline. It made so much sense, in such an odd way.

But still, he was his son?

But, as Link's snore reminded her, son or not, they both needed sleep. They had work tomorrow, and... Obviously, they would deal with that in the morning. For now: sleep.


	10. Link

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the documents Midna found, everything in Link's life seemed to do a full one-eighty for the better. But being big news means critics, and critics means dealing with the terrifying Ganondorf Dragmire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Monday!

The first thing Link did when he woke up was text Revali. Well, the first thing he really did was look down at the papers on his chest, remember what they were and what had happened, try not to hyperventilate, then text. But that didn't matter.

(Link): Revali you won't believe this

(Link): Revali

(Revali): It's too damn early we don't need to be at work until 12 what is it?

(Link): I don't know how to tell you can you just come over???

(Revali): Fine I'll be right there.

Waiting impatiently for Revali to get there, he read through the papers more thoroughly, then a second time. He was Chef Wilde's son. The last name, the job at Guard - it all made sense now.  
It was confusing that his mom hasn't told him, but he understood her reasoning. If he had actually thought he was Chef Wilde's son as a kid... 

He was Chef Wilde's son. His actual child. He knew that he and his mom had a thing back in the day, but this? This was something else entirely.

A knock on the door announced Revali's arrival. Link jumped up from the couch, throwing the door open in his haste and nearly slamming the file into his hands.

"Read this."

"What?" He raised a perfect eyebrow, blinking a couple of times.

"Oh! Come in... Then read it." Link stepped out of his way, backing up into his bike before actually letting him by.

Revali glanced around the apartment briefly, thankfully did not notice Midna still sleeping on the windowsill, and started reading. In the meantime, Link changed into some fresh clothes. He slept in the ones he wore yesterday, and felt disgusting there wasn't enough time for a shower, though; or there was, but this news had already gotten in the way of his routine badly enough to fuck it up.

"This is... Fully legitimate." Revali declared after reading through, eyebrows knit together in concentration, eyes wide. "You're Chef Wilde's son."

Link sat down beside him "Can you believe it?"

"...no, not entirely, but..." Revali parsed through the papers again. "This is his will, you are a DNA match, and your mother knew it, too."

"So... What do we do?"

"What do you think?" He grinned. "We confront Rhoam."

***

Rhoam, of course, denied any involvement in holding back information, instead congratulating Link on the 'news.' Then, when it became apparent that they knew about the will, he quit on the spot.

"Well, that takes care of one thing." Revali stated, holding Rhoam's discarded toque and jacket. "So, I'm assuming you're head chef, Mr. Wilde?"

Link shook his head. "How could I be, if I only know how to cook with you?"

He laughed. "I don't know. Who is, then?"

"Zelda."

Revali nodded. "That does make the most sense. And her sous chef?"

"Think you're up for the challenge?" Link asked with a wink.

"Are you kidding?"

He laughed, drawing Revali in for a kiss. "As long as you think you can handle being a sous chef and having to be around for me."

"Of course."

***

"Alright, everyone, big announcement tonight." Revali declared at the pre-service meeting, glancing back to Link.

He could feel himself blushing from the attention already.

"We discovered, in Rhoam's things, the late Chef Wilde's will. Stating that before this year, September 15th, if a different heir than Rhoam is found, they will take the restaurant."

"No." Zelda whispered, eyes wide. "Is that why he isn't here?"

Revali smiled at her, and have a slight nod. "Along with it, a DNA test with a parent-child match between Chef Wilde..."

He paused, drawing out the tension. Link wiped off his hands on his pants. Did he have to be such a showman? If it was up to Link, he would have just explained it, and then only so the other chefs knew why Rhoam wasn't here.

"And Link."

Everyone went completely silent for a moment, glancing back and forth between the two of them as if trying to figure out if he was kidding. It was quite a stretch, after all. Would they believe him? Would they-

Then, uproar. Cheers of 'Chef Wilde!' and 'The bastard is finally out of here!' filled the kitchen.

"What does this mean about Rhoam?" Mipha asked. "If Link is taking the restaurant."

"I am." Link signed with a nod. "Taking the restaurant, I mean."

Daruk grinned. "Great, Little Guy. And Rhoam?"

"He quit." Revali stated simply. "He's out."

Zelda cheered.

"Which makes Zelda head chef." Link stated.

"What?" Her face lit up. "Really? I would think..."

He shook his head. "I don't know the kitchen like you do."

Zelda laughed, then nodded. "Damn right you don't. Alright then, who's my sous?"

"I am." Revali puffed himself up like a bird.

"Great. Alright then, let's get ready for service!"

Everyone cheered, then went to their stations to get started.

***

It was hard to believe the amount of time that had gone by. Link was absently thinking about how much had happened as he cooked, all of the actions familiar and not needing as much attention as before. Not like it needed attention though, really. Four months. It seemed like so long to say it like that, but the time had gone by so quickly that it was hard to believe it.

He and Revali were going strong, and... It still felt like the first time each time they kissed. Holding his hand was electrifying. Every time their arms brushed in the kitchen, or their hands touched each other's as they worked, it felt like sparks flew. Things just kept getting better and better between them.  
As it turned out, Revali didn't know how to roller skate. That had been one of their more 'date' dates, since it barely felt like it counted to go out to dinner at the café. That little place felt like home to both of them...

...until it closed down. Apparently, feeling like home wasn't enough to keep a little place like that open, even if it was close to the airport and stayed open late. That had pressed the two of them to find other things to do, other places to go, but it was all good. They had started going to different restaurants around, both as dates and as inspiration. Some of the things Revali came up with for the restaurant were incredible; he never failed to blow Link's mind.

The restaurant was doing so much better, too. Zelda blossomed in the head chef role, and it was hard to imagine a time that she wasn't doing it... Mostly because, at the end of the day, she was really the one doing it even when his father was the one with the technical job. 

Critic reviews started to pile in on the new menu, and the feedback was overwhelmingly positive. Ghirahim referred to the soup as "A revelation," and Vaati called their veal steak "A breath of fresh air." Between Revali and Midna mostly, but the other chef's too, just being allowed to come up with new ideas and recipes changed the whole restaurant. They got their fourth star back; the fifth was still removed in honor of Chef Wilde, but there were questions of bringing that back, too, with a Wilde in the kitchen.

Chef Wilde... Link would never get used to people calling him that, and yet they did. Press conferences and interviews and photos for newspapers - it seemed like with this newfound parentage, no matter how much he tried to keep it on the down-low, people would be over the top excited. It was getting a little exhausting, but... It was fine. Especially with being able to go back to his, new and better, apartment and just crash on an actual bed. 

A bed! Not just a couch. And his bicycle wasn't just crammed in the entryway anymore.

It seemed easy to ignore all the things at the restaurant once he left, these days, with such a place to come home to.

But...

A critic had come in. They had dealt with a whole lot of other critics before, but this one was different.

He was the one who cause Guard to lose of of the five stars, back before Chef Wilde - his dad - died. Ganondorf Dragmire. He showed up during one of the press interviews, just walked in, the air feeling colder just for his presence.

But that was all. He announced that he would be coming to dine, and that he would likely be disappointed, then left.

Quite frankly, Link was scared to death of him. His review, the one that dropped the star, also lead to his dad's health failing. This guy inadvertently killed his father. And now he had to cook for him? That was, that was...

"Wow, you really are out of it today, huh?" Revali asked, nudging him with his elbow.

"What?"

"You turned to look at me, then you never responded. Totally spaced out." He chuckled. "You really haven't done that in a while, sleepwalker."

Link shrugged. "Yeah, I guess I'm just..."

"Nervous about Dragmire?"

He nodded. 

"Don't be. Our food is good. Better than it's ever been. If that pretentious fuck comes in here and tells us that our food isn't to his liking, so what? No one else is complaining."

Link sighed, then took in a deep breath. "Thanks, Revali."

"No problem, love. Now get back to it, you're stressing me out with the sleepwalking thing again."

He laughed. "You keep calling me that."

"Remember? You always seem half asleep in the kitchen?" Revali reminded, elbowing him again. "Alright, back to work - I've got to keep my eye on you so I know you'll actually cook right."

Shaking his head with a smile on his face, Link got back to work. He was prepping the salmon for tonight, which meant making up the herb crust. It sounded straightforward, but Revali had really outdone himself on this one. It truly was a task to prepare. But it didn't cost a lot, and it was good enough to defend its difficulty, so it stayed on the menu. But right now...

"Wait!" Revali put a hand on his arm. "Use this mint, it's much better quality."

Link smiled, reaching for it, but-

His hand wouldn't move. No mater how much he tried to force his arm forward, it wouldn't move. Midna was in his hat, pulling on his hair, keeping him from taking this ingredient. Why? Did she know immediately, by sight or scent or something that this mint wasn't actually better than the other stuff?

"Are you... Okay?" Revali asked, narrowing his eyes. "Is there something wrong?" 

Link shook his head, still trying to reach the container. Midna was still fighting him on it, trying to force him to keep working at his station, but he was still just reaching.

Finally he just rolled his eyes, putting the mint directly into Link's hand. "Since you seemed so frozen there. Seriously, are you feeling alright?"

He nodded.

Revali looked at him like 'Really?' "Do you need a bit of air for a moment?"

Link paused, then nodded, making a beeline for the exit.

Immediately once he was outside he shut the door, reached up, and let Midna down.

"What was that all about?" Link's signs were quick and sharp, brows drawn down in a tight line. "You're not the only one with opinions, you know!"

Midna gave him a blank stare.

"You need to learn how to work with other people! Your opinions aren't the only ones that matter. Revali is a very good, very capable and intelligent chef."

She nodded, seeming to agree with that.

"...so you should trust him about the mint."

Shaking her head, she seemed to look Link dead in the eyes.

"Why? Does it hurt you that much to just... Go along with what someone else is doing?"

Midna paused, then nodded.

"You know what? This isn't the attitude we're working with in the kitchen right now. I'm sorry, you need to take a break Midna, okay?"

She blinked, totally stunned.

"I know you're tired and stressed out about the whole Ganondorf thing too, so just... Take the night to yourself, okay? Hang out with your friends... Do you have friends?"

She nodded.

Link sighed, putting his toque back on. "Alright then, just... Take a moment to chill out. When you come back can you please try to listen to other people?"

He swore that, before she hopped down from the dumpster and ran away, she shrugged. The attitude that rat had sometimes; Link could not believe it...

Though, he was now just himself, not a skilled chef, needing to start up service. Shit.

No, they had done it without him before. And besides: he really did have paperwork to be done for the restaurant. So it was back to the office he went. Not as fun, but... It needed to be handled. Taking a deep breath, Link stepped back inside.

"Revali, can you cover my station? Just remembered paperwork I need to file."

Revali nodded, then winked. "Better than having a sleepwalking chef."

Link smiled, walked back to his office, and immediately slumped down. The stress was really getting to him now, and... He would be fine. The restaurant would be fine.

Ganondorf had started appearing in his dreams though, ordering grotesque things like his head on a platter, his heart on a spit. Every time he was taking the order, though, strangely enough, even though he never waited tables here a day in his life. Though, he had worked in a roller skating diner, back in high school. But imagining Ganondorf Dragmire there...

He almost laughed. That was what he needed, apparently - just a different look at things. They would be fine, just like Revali said. As long as Midna was cooking for him, whatever they served Ganondorf would be just great.

Nodding to himself, Link walked over and got to work on the papers. At least that was one thing he actually knew how to do in a restaurant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, that chapter seemed short, huh? Idk


	11. Midna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Midna gets kicked out of the restaurant, she wanders, and ends up the only place she could: home.

"You need to learn how to work with others." Midna mocked, rolling her eyes. "Yeah right..."

Over the past four months, Link had gotten... A little thoughtless. More than a little thoughtless, actually. It was like he didn't have time or energy for anything anymore. Like, she knew his mom hadn't told him who his dad was so it wouldn't get to his head, but she didn't think it would affect him this negatively to learn about it.

But no. Suddenly being the important, amazing son of legendary Chef Wilde had overcome his life, barely leaving any room. And that room was all reserved for Revali.  
They were adorable, really, and she was happy for them, but just because he loved him did not mean she was about to use a subpar product in a dish when she could help it. That mint didn't smell as fresh, it didn't look as good, and she had already started chopping the other stuff. Three strikes, it was out, she didn't want to use it.

And yet, Link wanted her to use it. No, he had insisted.

It wasn't that she didn't respect Revali's opinion, even. He was a talented chef, and he worked hard to be where he was now. But did that mean she was going to follow everything he said? Absolutely not. Even the other chefs within the kitchen had disagreements like that. Link really wasn't thinking if he thought she would go along with something she didn't agree with.

But apparently that meant she had an attitude, now. Midna rolled her eyes.

He kicked her out of the kitchen! She ground her teeth, feeling her fur bristle, her ears flatten down. This was ridiculous. Of the two of them, she was the chef. He was just the image, son of Chef Wilde or no. She was the one who let them be anything at all; if it wasn't for her he would have lost his job after fucking up the soup, he never would have ended up with Revali, and he never would have even learned who his father was, in all likelihood.

Walking aimlessly as she was, Midna wasn't sure whether or not to be surprised when she ended up at the colony's dinky little boat. On one hand, she didn't really expect to be here when she set out. But, at the same time...

She missed home. She missed all of them, as much as she liked to pretend she didn't need them... It was getting really lonely being so separate. She hadn't seen any of since... Since she found the papers in Rhoam's desk drawer.

That had been months. Too long. Far, far too long.

How would they accept her, though? She left. For months now she had done nothing for them. It would make no sense for them to welcome her back, especially after her exit when Zant welcomed her back, and what Navi had said to her.  
But right now? Midna didn't care. Because they would welcome her back if she offered something in return, and man, did she have something to offer.

Food. Lots of it.

So taking a deep breath, and stepping back a few paces to get a running start, Midna ran forward on all fours, across the rope, and jumped down into the boat.

She hit the bottom with a solid thud, the impact stinging her paws.

There was no uproar this time. No surrounding of hugs and cries for a party. Just total, deafening, silence. All eyes were on her.

"So you came back." Zant finally said, stepping forward. "Finally realized the restaurant boy didn't really want you around?"

Midna's eyes widened. "How did you-"

"I saw you." He stated simply. "You know, I'm all for bravery, but this? You're just going to get yourself killed!"

"Zant, I'm not going to listen to this in front of everyone." She growled, low under her voice. "If you want to step out-"

"So what? Did he get tired of his pet rat?"

"Don't!" Midna snarled. "Call me a pet one more time..."

Zant rolled his eyes. "Really, Midna, I expected it. Didn't we all?"

The whole colony seemed to nod, disorganized as they are, in unison. A panic started to bloom inside her chest, making her breaths come quick.

Then she remembered what she was here for. It didn't matter if Zant was bigger than her, or if his slightly eccentric ways had a lot of the rats following him. He still wasn't the leader of this colony. 

And neither was she.

They were disorganized; they had their own minds. And there was one thing a rat's mind was always on.

Midna stood up taller on her hind paws. "Well, I didn't come back to beg for a place in the colony; I came back to invite you all to a feast."

Murmuring broke out across the crowd, deafening despite the whispers.

"A feast?" Zant's head tipped to the side. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that I have access to the pantry of one of the finest restaurants in Paris, Zant." She spat his name, confidence growing as she explained. "More food than you've ever seen all at once."

"In direct sight of humans!" Zant pointed out. "You would lead us like that? Into so much danger?"

"I also know when they close. No one should be in the restaurant past midnight."

He frowned, taking a step forward. "My point still stands."

"Zant, are you trying to persuade us out of food... Because there are humans nearby?" Navi blinked. "That doesn't seem like you."

"I'm trying to look out for the colony-"

"Are you?" Tatl took a step forward. "Or are you trying to secure your own power?"

Fi glanced nervously between the four of them, nose twitching. "I sense a 75% chance this will not end well."

"This doesn't need to be about power." Midna declared, shooting a glance at Zant. "Anyone who wants food follow me: anyone who doesn't, stay."

And Midna walked out with an army of rats behind her. Because with Link, she controlled him with her hands. With the colony? She led them with her voice.

*** 

By the time they got to the restaurant, as Midna expected, all the lights were out. It took what felt like forever to herd all of the rats, without losing anyone and without being seen, all the way over to Guard. But, once they got here...

"How will we get in?" Someone asked; Midna didn't see who.

Someone else answered. "Idiot, there's a window open."

Hopping up onto the dumpster, she gestured for others to start to follow. When the first rat made it up, she started inside. 

"Careful, don't fall into the sink." Midna hissed behind her, listening to the echo that followed all the way down the line, until every rat heard.

Now, the walk-in fridge should be unlocked...

Thankfully for her, this time it was. Midna jumped out onto the door handle, squeezed the mechanism and let it fall open.

And in flooded the rats. The moment the door opened and the first in line saw the food, they were all running to get in. It was just as she thought when she first saw it: this was a rat's paradise.

And now it really was. Screw what Link was trying to do right now, he couldn't afford to give her up.

Especially right before critic of critics Ganondorf Dragmire came for supper. Link would need her back to cook for that; there was no way he would continue without her. And this? Some part of it felt right. She was providing for her colony. This was what she was supposed to do.

But, at the same time... She knew what Link would do if he saw them here. It was wrong to steal, or she didn't need to steal. That was what he always told her, in the beginning, when it came to food. So now, enabling all her people to steal food like this? It was-

The outside door opened with a creaky groan and a jingle of keys.  
"Quick, everyone! Hide!" Midna yelled. "Someone came in!"  
Immediately there was panic, but it was replaced very soon by hiding. Rats were hidden behind every imaginable surface in this walk in, right now, and-

A rat fell, making a small thump noise when he hit the ground, followed by a loud, high-pitched squeak.

"Shh!" Was the resounding chorus, but it was too late.   
The walk in wasn't soundproof by any means. Not long passed before the door was swinging open, Link standing in the doorway. Midna breathed a sigh of relief. She could deal with Link, but if it had been any of the other chefs? She would have been done for.

Jumping down to the ground, she scruuried over to where Link was standing. Still, adrenaline coursed through her veins. This wasn't right.

"Oh, it's just you, Midna." He signed, the tension dropping from his shoulders. "I heard something in here and it freaked me out."

She nodded, not sure at what, but she did.

"I just... I want to apologize for earlier today. I shouldn't have just put you outside like that, it was childish and dumb."  
This time, she knew exactly what she was nodding at.

Link laughed. "You really are a funny little rat aren't you?"

Was that a compliment? Midna wasn't sure, but once more, she nodded anyway.

"I guess I've just been really stressed lately? And I know that you are too. So we should just, like, figure out what we're going to serve him, and..."

A sound came from the back of the walk in, like a rat slipping on the metal shelf and trying to stay up.

"Did you just hear that too?" Link asked, standing back up to his full height.  
Midna, desperate that he not find the other rats, shook her head.

"Something isn't right here." His brows knit in a tight line, taking a step forward. "What's..."

He flipped on the light, and immediately it was plain as day: the walk in was full of rats.

"You- did you- you let in-?" Link's eyes were wide, glancing around at the shelves. "How-?"  
It only took one rat to jump down and start running for them all to go. They were out the door, or the window, in this case, and into the outside world. But Midna? It felt like her heart had frozen over. The look on Link's face was pure betrayal. She had done this. She stole food from their restaurant, and-  
"How could you?" He asked, tears welling up in his eyes. "How many times have you done this?"  
She shook her head, trying to plead with him, but Link was beyond listening.   
"I trusted you!" His hands were shaking, head hanging low. "You know what? This is what I get for trusting a rat, I guess."

No. No, this wasn't happening-

"Goodbye, Midna. It was... I thought it was good while it lasted." He reached down, offering her his hand to crawl into. 

Midna, without hesitation, took it. Old habits die hard, she guessed. He walked her over to the window, placed her on the sill, and as soon as she was out?

He shut the window. That was all it took, and Midna was devastated. All of the emotions rose to the surface. All of the pain, all of the sadness from losing this opportunity, all of the anger at Link and mostly herself-  
It was over. This was all, completely, over.

Most of the rats were running back to the boat, but she just couldn't. Absently, she started wandering, wondering where the city would take her if she never stopped moving.

"Hey... I'm sorry about how that turned out." Navi fell into step beside her, letting out a little sigh. "I didn't realize it meant so much to you."

She turned her head away. "I guess it doesn't matter anymore." 

"Is there anything I can...?"

Midna shook her head. "I think I just... Need to be alone for a bit."

"Okay." She said, but didn't go away. "Zant's going to be happy it didn't turn out."

"Of course he will be." 

"But... If I'm honest... I think that now he's leader-"

"What?" Midna jumped awake. "He's the leader?"

Navi nodded. "It just kind of happened."

"That's..." She sighed, slumping back down. "Fine. I'm sure I'll wander back there eventually."

"But what I was saying is... I think most of us..."

"Save it, Navi." Midna shook her head. "Right now, I really just need time on my own."

"...okay." 

Navi didn't follow beyond that, she just left Midna to wander off on her own. It was cold out, December in Paris wasn't exactly the warmest time and place, but she barely felt the chill. No, she was already numb.  
Just walking around led her down roads with shops, places she had been around in Link's bike basket so many times. She passed where the little café he loved was, now just an empty building available for lease. She passed the attorney's office where the will was verified. All these places were too familiar, too well loved. 

And she couldn't go back to the colony. Zant was in power; there was no way she could go back.

Midna couldn't stand it here. Turning towards another way, somewhere Link had never taken her, she ran. Full sprint, on all fours like a real rat, not like a rat playing at being a chef. She needed to break away from this. She had to forget, to actually live as a-

All of Midna's thoughts went silent when she saw the shop. "Exterminator" was written in large red letters above the door, but that wasn't the part that held her frozen still as a statue. 

In the display window, hanging from the ceiling, were rats. 

She choked. They were fake, they had to be fake, with their heads caught in traps, limp tails dangling down. Below them, racks upon racks of rat killers lined the shelves. Poisons like she had sniffed out at the old lady's house, poisons like she had never seen before. There were kinds that declared to be odorless, kinds that were colorless.

Rat killer. It was all designed to kill rats.

This is what humans thought of them. This was the truth. They would never respect her as a chef, they would never allow it to happen in their restaurants. The only place designed for her in this world of humans was hanging from a trap in a shop window. 

And it wasn't like rats wanted her much more than that, either.


	12. Link

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Midna is gone, Link is panicking, Ganondorf arrives-
> 
> And it all breaks loose.

Link was missing his chef, and worse, it was his fault. He kicked Midna out. 

He kicked her out.

Now what could he do? He didn't have the slightest idea how to cook. Sure, he had watched her do it, but that didn't mean that he knew how to do it. All those steps, the recipes she had carefully memorized, none of it he remembered well enough to cook with any confidence. Hell, he didn't know how to cook at all with any confidence. Or how to cook at all. All he knew how to do was throw a few things in a pot together and hope it turned out fine. How was he going to-

Deep breaths. They would be fine... Right? They had to be fine. He would manage. The others could pick it up for him.

Except Ganondorf was coming tomorrow night, and all of his chefs would be expecting him to cook because he was the prodigy, the miracle, the new Chef Wilde, even though he knew less about cooking than a-

Than a rat. He knew less about cooking than a rat. Far, far less. Midna was amazing, and now he...

She had a plan, before he kicked her out. He knew that she had a plan, and now all of that was out the window. He had been depending, even, on the fact that she had a plan. And now, on his way home, no ideas would even cross his mind. 

What would he want for dinner, if he was a terrifying food critic with a reputation for disliking everything he tried to eat? He had no idea, and it wasn't helping to worry like this.  
But when Link got back to his apartment, wheeling his bike in through the spacious door and locking it behind him, he still reached down into the basket of the bike to let Midna out. Then, even though there was nothing in his hand, he walked over to her little bedroom on the windowsill. It was routine, at this point. It hurt too much to change it.

Except he did change it. She was gone. And it was his fault.  
No amount of sleeping on a real bed would make his sleep restful that night.

***  
In the morning, Link felt like shit. He was groggy and tired, not having slept well, his heart feeling jumpy beyond belief. He couldn't do this. He couldn't go to work and try to lead his team because it would just be lying if he did. He couldn't keep this up, pretending everything was fine. What if he had to break down a chicken? There was no way he could do it. Hell, there was no way he could do any of this, so how-

But he had to.

Taking a deep breath, Link tried to channel some courage. He could do this. He could rely on his other chef's. It would be fine... Right? Zelda was the head chef, not him, so he could rely on her to hold them together. Revali was still with him. Everything would be fine.

He got ready quickly, still made a tiny omelet for Midna, and rushed out the door. 

It only hit him halfway to the restaurant that Midna wouldn't even eat it later. She was gone. She wasn't coming back. He kicked her out for real.

So the tiny omelet still sat on his counter, getting cold.

***

When he got to Guard, most of the team was already there.

"Hey, Link, nice of you to show up." Revali smirked, kissing him on the cheek. "It's the big night; Ganondorf's coming."

"I know..." Link frowned, reaching up to tug on his hair.

"It'll be fine, just... Say something to the chefs, okay?"

He swallowed, then nodded. Grabbing a stool, he set it down near the center of the kitchen, then-  
He froze. Completely, entirely froze. What could he say? His confidence was gone without Midna cooking for him, so how could he reassure them without feeling like a liar? He couldn't, and now the panic was setting in, standing up in front of everyone, and...

They were all looking up to him. For guidance. For direction. And Link froze like a deer in the headlights.

He was a fraud. At least Rhoam had been somewhat honest about what he was doing, even when he was selling the frozen foods and all. But Link? Link just kept pretending to be something he wasn't. His hands felt stiff. His heart pounded in his chest.

Revali cleared his throat. "Ganondorf is coming, but he's just like every other customer who sets foot through those doors. Only difference is that he's just more of an ass. Alright?"

A resounding chorus of "Right!" followed.

"He has no power over us!" He clapped. "Now, let's get to work!"

They all started prepping, getting ready, preparing their stations, but...

"Link? You okay?" Mipha asked, stilling one of his shaky hands with her own. 

He set down his knife to sign. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure?"

He nodded. "Yeah..."

"You don't look so great, Little Guy." Daruk agreed. "Need a second to-"

"I'm fine! I'll be..." Link's hands lost the words, so he just nodded, picking his knife back up again to prep.

He was not fine. His knife work was sloppy and he had no clue what he was doing. He knew what this was supposed to look like, and this was not it. Right now, all he could hope for was that things would be okay.

"You sure?" Revali asked softly, once Mipha went back to her station. "You're completely shut down, aren't you?"

Link paused, then nodded. 

"You think you'd be able to handle something without a knife better? You're butchering this lettuce. And it's... Lettuce."

He turned red, like Revali had just started teaching him again, and nodded.

"Great, take over my station and I'll take yours... And Link?"

"Yeah?"

"I know that it'll be alright; I trust you."

The warmth in Link's chest was ruined by the way his heart sunk, heavy with the weight of carrying this lie for so long. Revali didn't know him without this, even. Would he still love him if he knew the truth?

***

Ganondorf Dragmire arrived not long after service began, and the kitchen seemed to go wild. The chefs were panicking, which made the waiter panic, which meant everything just went to pieces.

"Well, what did he order?" Revali asked, trying hard and failing badly to be calm.

"He ordered whatever the chef will serve him!"

He turned to Link. "Well, then, what will we serve him?"

"I don't know... What about the soup?"

Zelda rolled her eyes. "Everyone's had the soup; it would be basic and poor etiquette."

"The salmon?"

Mipha shook her head. "We can't - our salmon won't arrive for another two weeks or so because of that shipping delay - it's off the menu."

"Well, uh..." Link frantically wracked his brain. "Why don't we just... Pull out on old Chef Wilde recipe?"

"Recipe?" Revali scoffed. "He'll want something new."

"Then cook something new!" He exclaimed, backing up a little.

"Will I be able to serve him anything?" The waiter asked.

"Shh, we'll handle it, just go." Zelda told him, rushing him back out into the restaurant. "Don't you have an idea prepared? He gave us time."

"I didn't think of anything!"

Revali sucked in a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. "It will be fine; right now we need to remain calm. His order just came in, work on the others before him."

Zelda nodded. "He's just another customer. Back to work, we're running behind on orders! We still need that tuna, Revali are you on that?"

"Yes chef!"

"Fantastic. And Daruk..."

***

"You've had time to think! Now you need to make something for him!" Revali insisted. "Do you need me to cook something?"

"Yes!"

"No, you don't!" He huffed, pinching the bridge of his nose yet again. "How many times have you come up with recipes like this on the fly?"

None without Midna. "A few?"

"A few? A lot." Revali nodded. "You've got this, just... Cook."

"But guys I'm not-" link took a deep breath. "I'm not the chef."

Daruk nodded. "Of course you're not THE chef, but-"

"No, I'm not even- I'm not even a chef!"

"That's not true at all." Mipha disagreed, shaking her head. "You're amazing."

"No I'm not!"

"You are, now make something!" 

"I can't!"

"Yes you can!" Revali put his hands on Link's shoulders. "Just relax, and-"

Link backed away, squeezing his eyes shut, making his way to the door. "I'm not the one who knows how to cook."

The kitchen went dead silent, besides the sound of sautéing vegetables and searing steak. No one said a word for a moment, just blinking in confusion.

And Link knew he fucked up.

"What?"

"I was... I messed up the soup. Badly." He started to explain. "It was horrible."

Urbosa nodded. "I agree with that."

"And it wasn't me who fixed it!"

Zelda blinked, glancing over at Revali. "Then who did?"

"It wasn't me." Revali said, turning back to Link.

"It was..." He could feel himself going bright red. "Never mind, I just need a moment."

No sooner had he cracked open the door, though, did everyone gasp.

"Rat!" Daruk yelled, and everyone grabbed something to shoo it out the door.

There, on the kitchen floor, was Midna.

Link stepped in front of all of them. "No, wait!"

They all froze. Revali raised a questioning eyebrow. Zelda put her hands on her hips.

"This rat is the real cook." Link confessed, reaching down and scooping her up, letting her crawl up to his shoulder. "She's the one behind all... This."

Daruk laughed. "What kind of metaphor is that?"

"It's not a metaphor; it's the truth." He swallowed. "I didn't make the soup, because she did. She was the one who fixed it, and I saw. So when Rhoam sent me to kill her..."

A long pause.

"You didn't." Revali finished, squinting suspiciously. "But how?"

"We figured out that, by hiding in my toque and pulling my hair, she could control my movements."

Everyone laughed. "Good, I thought you were serious for a moment."

"Alright, thanks for lightening things up, Link." Zelda said, still smiling. "But we're in the middle of service, we need to get back to-"

Link let Midna crawl up onto his head, knocking his toque off to demonstrate in plain view. It looked like he could just be playing around at first, but as she started to use him to chop vegetables, it became clear. The smiles started falling off faces.

They stopped, Midna setting down the knife. "So, you see? I'm not the chef. But now that she's back... Maybe we're good?"

"A rat." Daruk said out loud, eyes wide. "All this time... It's been a rat cooking?"

He nodded.

Mipha sighed, then after an excruciating silence, stripped off her jacket and removed her toque. She handed both to Link, then walked around him to get out the door.

Mipha left. Soft-spoken, kindhearted, loyal Mipha. If she left-

Daruk stepped forward next, shaking his head, handing over his uniform too.

Then Urbosa, and Zelda, until it was just Link staring straight at the tears welling up in Revali's eyes. His chest already ached, body frozen in place.

"I still can't believe this." Revali swallowed, not bothering to wipe his eyes. "You know what? I trusted you. Four months. Four fucking months."

He took off his toque and apron, handed them over, then left. 

"And good luck with the restaurant!" He added from the door, right before he shut it behind him.

Everyone. All the chefs, the waiter, everyone was gone. There weren't more people he could call. This was it. They were alone.

Link set Midna down on the counter. "Well, it's just us, isn't it, Midna?"

She nodded, but didn't seem to want to meet his eyes.

"There's nothing we can-" A tear streaked down his face, and he paused to wipe it off. "We can't do anything, can we?"

Midna took a moment, then sadly shook her head.

And it was like Link's whole world crashed in on him. This whole time Midna had been the calm one, the one controlling his hands when they would have been shaking, but now... Taking a deep breath, he stood up a little straighter.

"I'm going home."

She didn't respond as he turned and walked away, opening the window, and leaving the door cracked open behind him. Already the rain had covered where all of the chefs and the waiter were parked, as if they were never there. Even the spot where Revali's motorcycle was: gone.

Link didn't even get on his bike, he just left it there and started home. If Midna was coming with him she would follow, but... Right now he needed a moment.

There was a restaurant full of people in there he was letting down.

Rain and tears mixed as they fell down Link's face, until he wasn't sure which was which. Was this losing? Had he just lost? Yeah, he was used to being a loser, but this... All he had right now depended on the restaurant; he couldn't just walk away from this.

And yet, that's what he was doing.

He was soaking through by the time he got back to his apartment, and immediately stripped off his wet clothes. There were few things worse in this world than being wet. Then, once thoroughly toweled off, he changed back into clothes.

Link stared at himself in the mirror, then realized his mistake. It was a little funny, in a way. After so many months of waking up, showering, then getting dressed for work he immediately put on a fresh chef's jacket out of habit.

No. He had done this for too long to just walk away. At the very least, he had to tell the diners they were closed. Taking a deep breath, Link straightened the buttons on his jacket, and started toward the door.

Except, he left his bicycle there, at the restaurant. He wouldn't be able to get there quickly, unless...

His old pair of roller skates stared at him from the corner. 

It seemed ridiculous, but... He had to do what he had to do. And right now, he had a restaurant to save.


	13. Midna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Midna, devestated, reflects on what went wrong in the kitchen... And the colony rallies together.

Midna couldn't bring herself to move. For what felt like an hour she sat there, on the counter, staring at the door. 

What was she thinking? Well, she really wasn't, and that was the truth. Did she really hope that any of this could turn out okay? Did she really think the other chef's would accept the truth?

No. They all left. Every single one of them. Even the waiter. The fucking waiter.

After last night, Midna had ended up wandering back to the colony. For a long time she had sat there, just like this, wondering if she would even be allowed to enter. But she was allowed to stay, though it was with no real enthusiasm. Everyone seemed to sense the dark mood she was in, and left her alone. Zant slept as far away as possible, but somehow he never once seemed to take his eyes off her. She barely slept all night, tossing and turning with those yellow eyes burrowing into her soul.

And yet, when she awoke, she didn't want to get up. She couldn't seem to. For a long time in the morning she lay still, eyes shut, breathing evenly, pretending she was asleep just so that she wouldn't have to face the day. She wasn't hungry. And not in the way she hadn't been hungry recently, having every need met and going to bed full every night. No, she wasn't hungry in the empty, numb feeling that filled her whole body.

She hadn't felt this way since before the colony. Back when she was young, scared, and alone.

But she had gotten up. When it got to be time for people to arrive for prep before service, Midna was outside Guard, watching through the closed window. It was too much of habit to give up now, to be waiting, to be there. Link was panicking, his hands shaking. Revali looked tense. Zelda's lips were pursed together tightly, brows drawn down in concentration. She knew those faces, she could guess what they were talking about, what all was going on in there. Before each chef did it, she practically knew what they were going to do.

Then it all went to shit.

Link stood up on a stool, and then Revali said something, and the whole kitchen dissolved into chaos. Link was backing up toward the back door, and Midna thought-

Never mind. She didn't know what she was thinking, because it ended in all of them leaving. She just wanted to get in those doors one last time, consequences be damned. 

At the end of the day, she wasn't a chef in their eyes. Even when they saw what she could do, she was only a rat.

The image of the poison flashed in her head again. That shop with the rats, tails dangling limply down. Heads crushed by traps.

But now she was alone in the kitchen, only imagining what was going on with the other side of the restaurant.

The door cracked open further, and in sauntered Zant, swaying on his feet. "I told you." 

Midna swallowed. "Go away, Zant."

"I told you nothing good would come from this." He restated, stepping closer. "You would have been better off if you hadn't left."

"Then why are you here?"

Zant laughed, that horrible squeaking cackle. "To remind you. That you left. That you aren't-"

"Enough of that, Zant." Navi cut him off, stepping forward from behind him, then locking eyes with Midna. "Did this really mean that much to you?"

There was a long silence, and her throat closed. "Of course it did."

"Then what do you need us to do?"

She blinked. "What?"

Zant glanced around turning to face the rats filing in. "No! We're going-"

Midna took a deep breath, then nodded. "Alright. Separate into groups of twenty five, we need to get everyone clean before we can start cooking!"

Tatl snorted. "Yes, Princess."

"Service is already started, so there are stations I need people to cover! Tael, take a group to sauces, Navi over there to seafood, Fi-"

Fi blinked, at full attention. 

"Go make sure all the desserts are perfect, not a ruffle of frosting out of place!"

She nodded, then moved to scuttle away.

"All rats will walk on their hind paws when handling food, keep your paws clean!" Midna yelled, reminded immediately of Revali talking about clean sleeves. "Next group, other proteins, next, salads! Let's get this moving!"

"Yes, Princess!" Was called back to her, all rats in unison.

All except one.

"Go if you aren't going to help." Midna looked down at Zant from her place on the counter, meeting his eyes. "I don't need you."

"You don't- I'm-" He tipped his head to the side, huffed, then stalked away, tail thrashing back and forth.

As good as that felt, though, Midna had more important business. Namely, a restaurant to run.

"I'm coming around to taste everything and make sure nothing's been messed up! Remember, clean paws, and let's get to work!"

Another chorus of "Yes, Princess!" this time sincere, answered her, quickly followed by the familiar noises of the kitchen. Midna was never still, always running from station to station, getting the kitchen in order again. Orders had begun to stack up in the other chef's disorder, but now...

Now they were getting on top of things. Food was starting to be placed in the window, ready to be served, but-

Fuck.

They had no one to wait tables. 

Obviously no rats could; that would be quite the show, but people would panic. The restaurant would be shut down near instantly. How could they possibly-

Someone was jangling the doorknob. The door had, apparently, gotten pushed shut at some point, and it must have been locked from how the person was struggling with it.

But it was someone with keys. That meant it had to be-

The door opened, and in skated Link. He was sprinkled wet from the now drizzling rain, dressed still in his chef's jacket and wearing roller skates. Midna could feel the relief flowing through her. He had been a waiter before; he was a waiter at a roller skate café, no less. 

This could work.

But immediately, his eyes went wide. She could see the way his throat bobbed, gagging at the sight of all these rats crawling over nearly every surface of the kitchen. 

The rat poison flashed through her mind one more. The matted fur and glassy eyes.

But, taking a deep breath, he nodded. "You need someone to wait tables?"

Midna nodded back at him.

"Just like the café." Link signed, mostly to himself, then stopped. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left, or kicked you out in the first place and-"

Midna held out a paw, and shook her head. She couldn't tell him that it was all fine, and he would just owe her later, so this was the closest she would get.

He nodded once again. "Alright. Tables."

They were already getting orders out in the window, so he quickly filled up the cart and went out into the main restaurant area. She smiled, watching him, then snapped back to reality.

"Alright, sauces! Everyone spoons down, flavor check!" 

She ran over to the saucier's station, taking a little taste from each spoon and giving feedback accordingly. Too sweet, needs more vinegar, not enough salt, and one sauce that was perfection. Then she made her way over to plating, where someone was...

Midna shook her head at the disorder. "You, go over to desserts. Fi! Come over for plating!"

Fi perked up instantly, nearly gliding across the kitchen to make it over. Without even being told she began cleaning up plates, fixing presentations.

"Thank you, Fi, remember we can't get sloppy on the presentation! How's that steak?"

Being pulled in every direction like this was tiring, but... Midna found herself enjoying every second. Barking commands, fixing orders, sending things to be remade - it wasn't long until the kitchen truly was operating like a well-oiled machine. They got off to a rough start, but...

The door rattled open again, and Midna spun around instantly. Was it another one of the chefs? Had someone else come back? Was it more rats? They wouldn't need a key now, so as long as they could open the door...

She hoped it was backup. They really could use a few more rats, in a couple stations.

But when she turned, she didn't recognize the man who stood in the doorway. For a second though, she was confused. Why was his picture on the wall of the restaurant next to him?

Then she read the words next to it: Chief Health Inspector.

Every rat in the kitchen froze.

The inspectors eyes went wide.

This could ruin everything.

Midna swallowed. "Alright, meat prep! Change gears and catch that health inspector!"

Even if the inspector didn't understand what that meant, he panicked. His phone was out in a moment, rushing out the door as fast as he could. The meat prep squad, and a few rats from other groups, she couldn't help but noticing, followed right on his heels.

But there wasn't time to get involved in that.

Link skated back into the kitchen, a little flustered and a little out of breath, but operational. "The dining room is doing better, but Ganondorf is still waiting."

Midna nodded. She hadn't forgotten about him just because she hadn't yet gotten the opportunity to cook his dish... Or possibly use Link to cook his dish. She wasn't sure how exactly it would be done, but-

"You have a plan?"

She nodded. She had been planning this since he announced he would be arriving and, somewhere deep in her bones, maybe longer than that. The dish she had in mind just felt right on a certain level.

Link paused. "Should I worry about that, or just keep waiting tables?"

Midna shooed him out the door, and he skated right back out into the dining area, a bottle of wine in each hand. How that boy managed to be such a human disaster in the kitchen, and yet was so graceful on roller skates, was beyond her. 

"Midna, is this right?"

She scampered over to the proteins section, testing the firmness of the meat with her paw. "Underdone. Give that sixty more seconds on the heat."

"Midna! What about this?"

"Too salty. Do it over!"

"Midna, is this right?"

"Yes, that's perfect, Coro."

"Midna! Tell him he needs to wash his paws!"

"Wash your damn paws!"

Question after question, thing after thing they needed help with, she was running over to make sure they had what they needed. Plates were leaving the door looking flawless and tasting even better. Dishes were being perfected, customers were being fed. It was a lot like how service normally was, except...

Midna glanced around at her whole colony, listening to her leading, doing something they all dismissed so thoroughly when she expressed an interest in it when she was younger. And now look at them all: cooking. Getting Wilde in the kitchen. 

That tag line was so cheesy, but it somehow felt more right when it was a bunch of rats doing the cooking. She felt a million miles in the air right now.

Except for Ganondorf, looming in the back of her mind.

But she couldn't worry about him; she would worry about him when... When? When they had a lull in service? When they were done sending out other plates? Right now? Because rats were calling for her at every second, to taste this, to test that, to determine whether or not those vegetables were fresh enough to be used... Above all, an extra set of hands would be useful.

And just like that, as if an answer to prayer, the door opened. Midna perked up immediately, running over to see who-

It was the meat prep squad.  
They were carrying the health inspector. Of all the things she expected, that was not one of them. His mouth, arms and legs were all bound, so his struggling was completely useless.

"Where do you want him?" One of the larger rats, Groose, asked. "Just like, on the floor?"

Midna shook her head. "We can't just..."

Where would she hide a person in a pinch, if she had to?

"The walk in." She answered, running over to open the door, unable to help laughing a little along the way. "Hide him in the walk in."

Groose nodded, leading them over and tossing him in, shutting the door behind him. "Alright, what now, Princess?"

"Wash off." Midna instructed. "Then get back to tenderizing. We need every rat on the job, now let's hustle!"

With them back, everything fell into place for real. They were putting out plates as fast as Link could serve them, except...

The one for Ganondorf Dragmire. But still, she didn't have the time, and she couldn't just-

The door opened again, and this time, it wasn't returning rats.

"What the fuck is going-"


	14. Link

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Link is roller skating as fast as he can to serve the tables at Guard while Midna and her colony of rats do the cooking; but who is it that opened the door?
> 
> And will the restaurant survive Ganondorf's critique?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second to last chapter!
> 
> And I almost posted a chapter of Mockingbird... Wild. Wrong Revalink story.

Back and forth and back and forth. From the restaurant, to the kitchen, back to the restaurant again. Link was used to roller skating quickly and waiting tables, but this? He was moving faster than he'd ever gone before, trying his best to satisfy each and every customer. He poured wine, he served food, he tried his best to answer questions - everything at breakneck speed, all without missing a beat. It barely felt like he ever made it back to the kitchen, but...

It really did seem like Midna had it handled in there. She was incredible, and he really had been taking those abilities for granted, so it made him happy to see her shine like this. She deserved this moment far more than he did.

Strangely enough, he felt pretty okay... Even though Ganondorf was still sitting there, perfectly silent. His thick red brows were drawn low over his piercing green eyes, a permanent frown worn into his full lips. He didn't appear to be a man for much pleasure, in his crisp black clothes and stately mannerisms.

He scared the hell out of him, that was for sure. And Link kept reminding Midna of his meal, that he had yet to eat, but she insisted she had a plan. They would be fine... Right?

Placing the last plate in his hands down, Link took a deep breath and whizzed past the other tables and back into the kitchen. He was jut about to load up on more plates, when-

The door opened, and in walked Revali. His clothes were drenched, his hair was soaking wet, loose locks plastered to his face from the rain. Despite being soaked, looking tired, shivering from the cold... He looked beautiful.

They met eyes for just a moment, and Link froze. 

What could he say? He lied. He lied, and Revali trusted him, and you know what? There wasn't a thing he could do to change that. He messed up.  
They both stood there, looking at each other...

...then he noticed the kitchen.

"What the fuck is going-" Revali gagged, barely pulling himself together. "What is- you- they-"

Link didn't know what to say. What could he say? Nothing he could do would explain the hundreds of rats now swarming the kitchen.

It was, in short, disgusting at first glance. He had no doubt Midna was keeping it sanitary, but...

Revali took a deep breath, squeezed his eyes shut, then gave a single nod. "Don't say a word, Link. If I think about this for one more second I'll leave and I will never come back."

He nodded, then nodded again, a little harder. 

"So, what do you need me to do?" He stripped off his leather jacket, and grabbed his chef's coat from the pile of them, still discarded by the door. "I'm here."

Link glanced at Midna. "Ganondorf?"

She nodded.

"We need you to start cooking for Ganondorf."

Revali raised an eyebrow, then nodded. "Alright, what are we making?"

Midna ran over to where Link was, and immediately he held out his hand for her to climb up. The moment she was back on his head she had complete control once more, as weird as it was. She walked them over to where the recipes were stored, immediately sorting through and picking one out.

"...chicken noodle soup?" Revali looked at the recipe card, then down at Link, then straight at Midna. "Are you serious?"

She made him nod, then lifted his hand in a so-so motion.

"So, a version of chicken noodle soup?"

A nod.

"...alright, I'll get started."

Midna made him nod again, then scampered off to squeak more things at her army of cooking rats.

In the meantime...

"You came back." Link signed, letting his shoulders relax. "I'm sorry, for lying to you, and-"

"Shh." Revali held a finger up to his lips. "If I was keeping a secret half so strange as this, I probably wouldn't have told you either. Besides, what does Chef Wilde say?"

He laughed. "Are you seriously quoting his awful tag line?"

Revali grinned. "I would say that this is getting pretty wild, wouldn't you?"

"Absolutely."

"Alright, then." He leaned in, pressing a quick kiss to Link's lips. "Now, we both have our work cut out for us, don't we?"

Blushing, he nodded. Loading his arms with plates, he skated back out there with his head in the clouds. Revali didn't hate him for lying. Maybe they would be good after all, even after all... That.

And he kissed him. Link couldn't wipe the stupid smile off his face as he laid down plates, asking if people needed anything, serving more wine... The feeling didn't go away, even when he once more approached Ganondorf's table to top off his wine glass.

"I'm sorry your wait has been so long; we're a little short tonight." He explained, trying to keep his hands from shaking.

Ganondorf grunted. "Please, take all the time you need."

Link smiled once more, collected the wine bottle, and skated back, breathing a sigh of relief.

When he returned to the kitchen, the smell of chicken noodle soup cooking hit him instantly, even above the other scents. It was incredible. Of course it was, since Revali was cooking it, because it so entirely reminded him of his mom, and it reminded him of the little café they used to go to, before it shut down. And Revali was back, his hair matching the place which reminded him of chickens which, in turn, reminded him of home-

It was incredible. That was all Link could say on that. The memories flowing back... Priceless.

"It smells amazing in here." Link signed, taking one look at the number of plates and beginning to load them onto the cart.

Revali snorted. "It had better; this needs to be good."

"It will be." He reassured him, placing the last plate on top. "I'm sure of it."

"You're easily impressed."

"Maybe." Link shrugged. "By you, anyway."

Revali blushed, shaking his head. "Alright, get to work you idiot."

Grinning, he grabbed up the cart and started once more. Back and forth, back and forth, serving food and filling wine glasses. The world kept spinning.

It was amazing how things kept switching around like that. An hour or so ago, he was thinking that he was going to have to come back and tell everyone to leave. And now? Now he was here, serving the food that Midna and her rats had prepared to happy customers, his boyfriend came back to the restaurant, and their reputation might not be in complete shambles.

Might not. The long wait certainly wasn't going to help their review from Ganondorf, that was for certain, but it was to be expected. A middle grade still passed, after all, and that might be the only real hope they had at this point.

But chicken noodle soup? When she first pointed to that recipe, he didn't believe it. That was the recipe his mom made for him as a kid when he was sick, not the recipe he would choose to make for a super important, hyper critical, insanely judgmental food critic. But after smelling it... He thought he understood.

At the end of the day, no one could be mad at chicken soup.

Unless, of course, there were a vegetarian, but-

Never mind! Link tried to silence his thoughts as he kept serving, just focusing on the tasks at hand. He got too wrapped up in his own head, and that was when stuff started to go wrong. Right now, he just needed to be a person in a place to get the food out. 

Dish after dish, until-

The only plate in the window was the bowl of soup for Ganondorf.

"Good luck." Revali said, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. "Don't find a way to fuck it up."

"I won't." Taking a deep breath, he picked up the bowl and skated out.

His heart was beating out of his chest.

"I'm sorry again, for the wait." Link signed after he set down the dish, holding his breath. "I hope you enjoy."

Ganondorf raised a thick eyebrow, casting a doubtful stare at both Link, and the soup. He clicked his pen with his right hand, jotting down an additional note, something about the simplistic appearance of the food. But when he raised the spoon to is lips-

He set the spoon back down.

Link almost panicked. Was it bad? Was it horrible? Did something go terribly wrong with it from the kitchen to his table?

But no - he reached forward, took his pad of paper, and tucked that back into his jacket. Then, without taking another note, he picked up the spoon again.

Instantly, relief filled Link's whole body when he saw a smile start to form on Ganondorf's stern features.

"Is- is everything to your liking?"

"Quite." He said with a nod.

Link took that as his cue to skate away, straight back to the kitchen.

And that's where it all immediately hit him. He didn't hate the soup. He didn't yell at him. Nothing like that. Relief flooded through his body, causing his knees to buckle.

Revali was by his side in a moment. "Are you alright? Link, what happened? What did he say?"

"He liked it?"

"Was that a question, or a statement?" He asked, eyes wide. "What do you mean?" 

"He said it was good." Link stated, taking a deep breath and pulling himself back up to his wobbly skates. "I asked if it was to his liking, and he said 'quite'."

Revali smiled. "Well, of course he would like food prepared by me-"

Link shoved him, a laugh bubbling out of his throat. "But we're alright."

"We're alright." He confirmed. "I told you we would be... Thanks to Midna."

Even though she was a rat, Midna seemed to smile, then tell them to get back to what they were doing.

"Alright. Service isn't over yet, Chef Wilde." Revali winked. "Let's get back to it!"

***

"Excuse me-" Ganondorf's voice stopped Link as he was skating by. "I have a question."

"One moment." He swept over, placing the plate he was carrying down on the proper table. "Yes?"

"Now, normally I don't pay compliments to the chef, and in this case, it appears my chef is my waiter. To whom do I owe my gratitude?"

Link smiled, then paled when he remembered how complicated the truth was. "Just one moment, I'll... Go see."

Heart pounding, Link skated back into the kitchen. "He asked to pay compliments to the chef!"

"Who did?"

"Ganondorf!"

Revali immediately stood up straighter, eyes wide. "But... What did you tell him?"

"I told him I'd ask!" Link explained, trying to calm himself. "Did you cook it?"

"I can hardly take credit." He shook in his head. "The rat did all of the modification to the recipe."

Midna looked torn between happiness for recognition and murder for being called 'the rat.'

"Well, should I..."

"I can't take credit for another chef's work." Revali declared. "But bring me out; I suppose we must tell him something."

Link blinked. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It'll mean what it will. Now come on." Revali squared his shoulders and forged forward toward the doors.

"That's stressing me out-"

But he didn't see Link signing, instead just ploughing ahead into the restaurant. 

"-worse."

But Revali's iron confidence didn't fail him now. Link followed behind as he strode up to Ganondorf's table, stopping only when he reached it, hesitating for nothing.

"And you are the chef?" Ganondorf asked, a smile curling a lot the edge of his lip.

Revali shook his head. "To meet the chef, you must wait until all of the other customers leave."

So he intended to tell the truth. Ganondorf seemed surprised, and confused, but he didn't contest it.

"Alright then, I shall wait."

And wait he did. Link refilled his wine glass when it slowly drained to empty, tending to the other customers as the clock ran down. He almost hoped that, by the end of the night, he would be drunk enough not to remember the rat. Soon enough, though, there were few enough tables to count on a single hand. The numbers dwindled. Three, two, one.

"Are you ready to do this?"

Link and Midna nodded in unison, Link holding out his hand. She accepted this, crawling into his hand like she had so often. Revali placed a toque on top to hide her from view. 

He didn't feel ready. He was about to admit to a food critic that his meal was cooked by a rat chef. That all of their reputation was due to employees being able to have input and a rat chef's incredible talent. What kind of reaction would he prepare for? What kind of script could he have ready for that?

Also, how could he bring himself to sign, "Rat chef"?

But Revali was the one who did the explaining, when they got out there. He answered every question, let Midna up to Link's head for a demonstration, everything. His voice was civil, if a bit tight, and Link could tell that was just because he was nervous.

Even Revali got a little bit nervous.

And in the end... Ganondorf barely said anything. He nodded, thanked them for the meal, and left. His soup bowl had been completely emptied, scraped clean of any noodle, any shed of celery.

They all stood completely still, even after he left, as if they were afraid to even breathe. Link felt petrified and... A little bit let down, in a strange way. That was it. It felt a little bit anticlimactic, since he was preparing for a massive reaction, but it was a relief.

Midna let out a little sigh, shaking them out of their silence.

"Well... I suppose it's time to clean the kitchen." Revali said, glancing back at the doors. "Unless your rats are already on that."

She shrugged. 

"Alright then, let's..."

Link nodded, letting Midna crawl further up his arm so he could sign. "I'm exhausted."

Revali snorted. "No kidding, skating around like that."

"It's not that hard." He grinned. "Once you get the hang of it."

"I'll get the hang of it... Eventually. Now let's go."

The rats were, in fact, cleaning up the kitchen, nearly entirely done by the time they got there. Midna chattered something to a few of them, directing rats to different stations to clean up. 

"Think you'll be good without us, here?" Revali asked Midna, a skeptical look in his eye.

She nodded, then seemed to think better of it. Shaking her head, she gestured for them to follow her over to the walk in.

"Don't tell me you ate everything." Link groaned.

She shook her head again, then jumped up and unlatched the door.

"That's... Disturbing you can do that." Revali noted, then the door swung open. "Why is there a man in there!?"

Link blinked. "Who is that?"

Midna ran over, pointing up at a sign on the wall.

"Chief health inspector?" Revali took a deep breath. "Well, that's... Certainly something."

"We'll have to let him out."

"No shit."

"That'll mean the restaurant..." Link pointed out. "But there's not exactly anything we can do about that."

Revali nodded. "Did he just drop in for a visit?"

"Well, I guess that's that."

Midna nodded.

"Alright, then... Excuse me, sir?" Link shook his head, walking over to unbind the inspector. "We have a rat problem on our hands."

***

Once the traumatized health inspector was let go, and the rats finished cleaning up the restaurant, Link and Revali found themselves just standing outside. Midna had already left, wanting to spend time with her family. The rain had let up, leaving the night air cold, but feeling crisp and clean.

"Well, that was certainly something." Revali sighed, letting the tension go from his shoulders. "Shall I give you a ride home?" 

"I only have roller skates."

He blinked. "What?"

"Can you ride on the back of a motorcycle wearing roller skates? I don't have any other shoes."

"You are such an idiot." Revali pinched the bridge of his nose. "I would suppose so."

"Great." Link smirked. "And you're forgetting one part."

"And what's that?"

"I'm your idiot." He leaned in close, unable to get in his tiptoes to kiss him, but-

-Revali closed the distance. It was perfect. Even in the cold, after all that stress.

Then Link slipped in his skates. He grabbed ahold of Revali. Both of them tumbled over, crashing to the ground. 

"You okay?" Link asked, pulling himself off of him.

Revali nodded. "You?"

"Yeah..." He answered, then started laughing.

It was funny. All that stress, everything, dealing with the health inspector - then crashing to the pavement?

Rat chef?

Revali started laughing too, until they were both just a mess on the ground. 

"Okay, okay." Revali wheezed, standing up. "Need some help?"

Link took his hand, standing back up and getting his balance. "Let's go home?"

"Yeah, you clumsy fool."

So they both got on the motorcycle, Link wrapped his arms around Revali's waist, and they drove off.


	15. Midna - Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After it's all said and done, the restaurant closes, but that's not the end for Midna, Link, and Revali... Or even some of the others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this is so late. I've been crazy busy, had no time to post, by the time I was too late on Wednesday I couldn't until like, literally today.
> 
> Also, background Zelpha!

Guard was shut down the very next day. It was to be expected, they all saw it coming when the health inspector happened to be there, but it still seemed surreal as Midna, Link, and Revali 'found out' the next morning. Signs on the doors warned of the rat infestation festering inside. No doubt exterminators would be called, and all precautions taken, but the restaurant would never be the same after a scandal like that.

It was sad for Midna to see the restaurant she dreamed about for so long be shut down, but it was what had to happen. They let the health inspector out, and as soon as people knew there was a rat infestation? It didn't matter how good the food was, or what the review Ganondorf left of the place was like. Rats meant, well... Rats.

But that review.

Midna had Link cut that review out of the newspaper, so that she could keep it in her spot in the colony's boat. Before bed, in the morning, anytime she was in there, she would probably read it. It wasn't hard to imagine Ganondorf's deep, stuffy voice as she did.

"For many, many years I have been a critic. I have seen food of all kinds, good and bad, and I have judged them accordingly. These reviews are short, and in truth, often mean far less than the food they praise or dismiss.

"In this case, at the late Chef Wilde's restaurant Guard, taken over by his son in recent days, I was genuinely surprised; and that is something that does not happen often. I went expecting the same old stale Chef Wilde recipes, with a slightly new flair from the young chef. Emotionless food served to be high fashion and nothing more. No heart, soul, or passion, no joy of life.

"What I got, however, was a genius move that showed the true intelligence of the chef who, in my opinion, must be one of the very finest in France."

She had read it this morning, even, and practically had it memorized by now. After all, it had been about a month since the restaurant closed down.  
Link sold the building, too. It went for a good price, even with the rat rumors going around. And with the money...

Well, the little café near the airport they liked was being leased. With a little bit of negotiating, and offers of quite a bit of money, it was being sold for real.

It took a long time for the renovation to be complete, something Midna didn't really think she would be involved in. But Link had other plans. Up in the rafters soon became another, smaller restaurant. It seated as many as they could fit, with the small tables and chairs they found at a craft store, and was lit with fairy lights around the very top of the ceiling. Some of the longer vine plants they had potted down below came all the way up, making it less stuffy up there and providing some atmosphere.

Midna couldn't wait to serve her colony up there. As their leader, after all, she had to provide for her people. Who was to say what that had to mean?

They voted her in the very night they all ran the restaurant... Meaning they voted Zant out. Not out of the colony, but no longer their leader. He was still welcome, and she made a point of telling him that.

But he left. Apparently that was the last straw. Midna hadn't seen him in nearly a month, and she was alright with that. 

Well, 'alright with that' may have been a bit of an understatement, considering the party she threw. He was still technically welcome back if he showed up, but as long as he was gone? Good riddance to bad rubbish.

And despite the long period of time she wasn't with the colony, they welcomed her back like she never left. Well, Tatl and Tael kept joking around and teasing her with it, but that was just who they were. She loved them for it, like the weird younger siblings they were.

It was good to have Navi back. Even if she talked a lot, or was always telling her to listen and be careful, she really was the closest thing Midna had to family. She hadn't noticed how, over those four months with the restaurant, she had been so lonely.

Fi was also helping with the new restaurant, setting things up in the rafters and getting it all ready. If there was anyone who could get details perfect, it was her. Apparently, if everything went according to plan, the smaller restaurant had an eighty nine percent chance of success, just to account for major disasters, or Zant sabotage. She thought those odds were good enough, at any rate.

It was nice, getting to work with her family again... And not just sniffing out poison on food. While she felt very useful doing that, it was incredibly tedious. This? This was where she belonged.

But down below, the restaurant coming together was a different story. It had just been a quaint café, with a few booths and a limited seating area outside, which made size an issue. But a smaller restaurant meant less to renovate, so Link and Revali didn't seem to mind. They tore out the carpeting and replaced it, since the edges had started to mold a little, there were gross stains under a few tables, and tears were starting in a few places that were commonly walked. Light fixtures had to be replaced, seats had to be reupholstered - very few things needed no change at all, right at the beginning, which made progress go a lot slower, especially since the scale was so much larger. It felt empty down there for far longer than it felt empty up above, what with the new floor and the soft rugs laid down up there. 

Over time, though, and with a lot of work, it started to come together. Artwork started to be hung on the walls, small tables were brought in to fill empty corners with plants and knickknacks. 

Many of which, Midna noticed immediately, were chickens and rats. The chickens started to be a theme, but the rats? She guessed they would be a little joke with the public. First they had a restaurant shut down for a rat problem, next they decorate their new restaurant with rats.

That was just their kind of sense of humor, she supposed. It was funny, and when they asked her she could honestly say that she liked it.

As they got closer and closer to opening, the true feeling really started to come together: the restaurant was starting to feel like a home. It was cozy, with its plants and its artwork, the space fairly small but still big enough to breathe. At least, that's how Revali described it. It seemed pretty huge to Midna.

But opening the restaurant meant hiring people, and well...

Link and Revali were obviously going to work there as head chef and, surprisingly, waiter. After all that time pretending to be a chef Link liked restaurants, but not enough to keep letting Midna pull his hair. That meat they would need at least a couple more chefs in the kitchen, and definitely another waiter or two.

Midna herself was head chef on the rats part of things. She shared a kitchen, worked together with the human chefs, but she was in charge of making sure the rats needs were fulfilled. She was also allowed to have a rat staff of her own, but... She decided against having permanent hires.

That's just not how rats work. Everyone pitches in and dies their part; no one is forced to just do one job serving other people. They would take turns, and most of the colony agreed with that wholeheartedly. 

But as far as other human hires, they had to be okay with working in an environment with rats... Which narrowed down the list a bit.

A white-haired girl named Paya was hired on first. She worked at the café previously, and was experienced at a waitress. Midna liked her, even if she stuttered when nervous and was definitely a little bit afraid of rats. At the very least, she was very, very sweet.

Next, surprisingly, was Daruk. His reasoning?

"Working in a kitchen is already weird enough, this might as well happen... and I might as well do it with friends!"

He got over himself with the rat thing pretty quickly, too. So did Mipha. She wasn't sure at first, but the hesitation wore of near instantly. Midna liked her a lot; she was kind and gentle, which was a little odd for a chef, but she wasn't complaining.

She explained, though, that Zelda had gotten a job already at a high class restaurant across town, but that she would visit often. Apparently, their date nights would go between the two restaurants, which got an overdramatic "Awww" from everyone who knew them as a couple. 

Midna had never really noticed them, but she supposed she was more focused on making sure Link actually got work done.

Urbosa coming through the doors wasn't a surprise after the others, but she joined with just as much enthusiasm. She too got over the rat thing quickly. Maybe being shocked like that in the restaurant had gotten them thinking about it or something, because she didn't seem to mind at all from the start.

And at the beginning of things, that was it. Four chefs, five if she counted herself, and two waiters. They would need more, as the "Now hiring" sign displayed, but for an opening? This was it.

This was it.

Midna washed her paws again, and went down the list of her employees for the night, making sure they had too. Everyone would be coming, opening night, so this was a big deal. The other chefs seemed to be mentally prepareing for themselves too, as they prepped the food for service.

"Alright, let's start prepping!" Midna announced. "Alright, you start with the marinade, Coro on sauces, Navi prep the steak! I'm on vegetables, now let's get to it!"

"Yes Princess!" Echoed back from every voice.

So they cooked, and it was incredible. None of these rats had ever ordered off a menu or been served food; it was amazing, and Midna couldn't be happier to share it like this. 

Finally, it was all coming together.

"Zelda's here!" Link signed as he came into the kitchen. "Apparently, she had the night off."

Mipha blushed, trying to hide her face a little. "Of course she wouldn't tell me about coming tonight. She is like that, after all."

Midna laughed to herself and kept searing little steaks. It was harder, sometimes, to cook in this proportion, but she had gotten a hang of it... She thought. Maybe it needed some improvement, but they all had room to improve. And you don't get better if you don't try.

Paya zipped in. "Is order twelve out?"

"Yep, right here." Revali set down another plate in the window. "All four of these."

"Th- Thank you." She nodded. "And the food critic is here."

"What? Already?" Daruk's eyebrows went up. "Opening night? Who?"

"The scary one?"

"Ganondorf Dragmire?" Urbosa asked.

Paya nodded. "I think so?"

"What did he order?"

"He said to surprise him."

Revali turned to Midna with a smile. "I think that means you're up."

She nodded. "Navi, I have a timer going on these, flip them when it rings then cook for another thirty seconds. I have something else I need to do."

***

Service ended, finally, after a very, very busy day of work. That was good, though. Successful. The line that had stretched from the door all the way down the block had certainly been an indicator of that. 

People wanted to eat here. Midna smiled to herself. Because as amazing as that was, she knew that people would go to a new restaurant. But rats?

She saw that almost the entire colony tried to eat there; only a few rats didn't come, but that was to be expected. But this? All of her colony coming together like this?

This was Midna's dream. All this time she thought it was meeting Chef Wilde, or working at Guard; any of those things would have been or were good, but this? This is what she really wanted.

So, rat or human alike, if you happen to find yourself in Paris, look for a small café nestled between an attorney's office and a knife repair shop, near the airport. It'll be the one with the line leading around the block, with the plants by the doorway and the welcome mat at the door.

The sign on the outside proudly declares it's name: The Chicken Noodle Soup. And on that sign, hiding next to a steaming hot bowl, is a little, grinning, black rat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed!

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on Tumblr at Supertinywords or Supertinydom!
> 
> Comments are love <3


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